estherq0901
Sep 28, 2008
Writing Feedback / obstacles (definition essay) [2]
What do you want!? Don't you see I'm busy!? He lowers his face in sign of shame and regret ;he knows that after this comes a peculiar love gesture. He runs and hides against the wall feeling an uncontrollable burning on his face as well as in his heart. The aches and tears put him to sleep rolled up against the gray and dirty wall. As his mind enters a subconscious state he begins to dream. He finds himself in an unknown and empty street; confused he lowers his face as a form of protection from the fear of being hurt again; he sees a long dotted white line. Without looking up he follows the white line. when he realizes that he is alone and that the long line seems to be eternal he look up and around not knowing what to expect. Then in the distance he sees an orange spot in the middle of a green field. Filled with curiosity and wonder the feeling of fear disappears. He ran toward the green field leaving behind the empty street. His run seems to have no end; his body doesn't allow him to continue; he stops. Breathing hard he rests his upper body on his knees. With his hands on his knees and his face down his breath suddenly becomes stable again and feels as if someone had patted his back in sign of encouragement. He stands up straight and sees that the orange spot now seems closer and looks more like a white house surrounded by a tall brick wall. he continues his journey toward this mysterious house. After a long walk he reaches a colorful garden and stands still without being able to discover anything about the white house. All he could see of it was the roof and a chimney. The tall brick wall blocked his view. He stepped back and thought about how long it would take him to go around the enormous property and find the entrance gate. Tired after the apparent endless journey toward the white house disappointment and frustration provoked tears to come down his porcelain checks. Thinking that he would never be able to find the entrance gate he dropped his body on his knees and almost let the brick wall destroy his dreams.
With his dreams went his hopes of entering the house that revealed peace. A 10 year old child who suffers from a unfortunate life style is forced to confront many more brick walls throughout his life than those who live in a perfectly stabled environment. What does a child know about right and wrong? What does he know about strength and struggles if he has never been exposed to them? An environment where all he sees is failure might lead him to think that he should fail too, or it might encourage him to be the opposite of what he sees. Obstacles are trials presented to us by God to prove our strength and ability to progress. A child who lives in a small house located in a low life neighborhood full of delinquents unfortunately is more likely to follow the example of his parents and his environment. Children see, children do. Although this child can see and do, he can also pass the trial and find the entrance gate to the white house.
Throughout life we all come across various obstacles which can destroy our goals and dreams. Obstacles are often seen as brick walls ,but we never consider that there is always an entrance gate. An entrance gate for which we might have to struggle to find ,but no matter what it will always there. As it is often said God will never give you more than you can handle, and he will be the one that will give you a pat on the back to encourage you to continue your search. Brick walls were made to make us stronger not to destroy us. The search might be long and painful but without the entrance gate the white house will never be reached.
As Friedrich Nietzsche quoted "that which does not kill us makes us stronger." Although obstacles were designed to make us stronger, there is a possibility that they can kill us. Nietzsche's quote reveals the risk of destruction provoked by obstacles. Only those who are strong enough to overcome obstacles and find the entrance gate will succeed. Darwin's theory of survival says, "only the fittest organisms will prevail and will set standards of justice to the detriment of the weak." Darwin's theory reaffirms that those who are weak will live to be ruled by those who are strong enough to find the entrance gate.
When the child had decided that his long journey had been in vain and he would never be able to find the entrance to the white house he heard a voice calling his name. Encouraging him to continue his search. He stood up and wiped his tears off with the sleeve of his blue sweater. He walked toward the nearest corner of the brick wall. he walked still with disappointment on his shoulders but willing to continue. To his surprise after only walking a few steps, just around the corner was the big entrance gate. Open as if it had been waiting for him to find it. He looked up and tears began to drop realizing that being so close he was about to give up. He was about to give up the opportunity to progress.
What do you want!? Don't you see I'm busy!? He lowers his face in sign of shame and regret ;he knows that after this comes a peculiar love gesture. He runs and hides against the wall feeling an uncontrollable burning on his face as well as in his heart. The aches and tears put him to sleep rolled up against the gray and dirty wall. As his mind enters a subconscious state he begins to dream. He finds himself in an unknown and empty street; confused he lowers his face as a form of protection from the fear of being hurt again; he sees a long dotted white line. Without looking up he follows the white line. when he realizes that he is alone and that the long line seems to be eternal he look up and around not knowing what to expect. Then in the distance he sees an orange spot in the middle of a green field. Filled with curiosity and wonder the feeling of fear disappears. He ran toward the green field leaving behind the empty street. His run seems to have no end; his body doesn't allow him to continue; he stops. Breathing hard he rests his upper body on his knees. With his hands on his knees and his face down his breath suddenly becomes stable again and feels as if someone had patted his back in sign of encouragement. He stands up straight and sees that the orange spot now seems closer and looks more like a white house surrounded by a tall brick wall. he continues his journey toward this mysterious house. After a long walk he reaches a colorful garden and stands still without being able to discover anything about the white house. All he could see of it was the roof and a chimney. The tall brick wall blocked his view. He stepped back and thought about how long it would take him to go around the enormous property and find the entrance gate. Tired after the apparent endless journey toward the white house disappointment and frustration provoked tears to come down his porcelain checks. Thinking that he would never be able to find the entrance gate he dropped his body on his knees and almost let the brick wall destroy his dreams.
With his dreams went his hopes of entering the house that revealed peace. A 10 year old child who suffers from a unfortunate life style is forced to confront many more brick walls throughout his life than those who live in a perfectly stabled environment. What does a child know about right and wrong? What does he know about strength and struggles if he has never been exposed to them? An environment where all he sees is failure might lead him to think that he should fail too, or it might encourage him to be the opposite of what he sees. Obstacles are trials presented to us by God to prove our strength and ability to progress. A child who lives in a small house located in a low life neighborhood full of delinquents unfortunately is more likely to follow the example of his parents and his environment. Children see, children do. Although this child can see and do, he can also pass the trial and find the entrance gate to the white house.
Throughout life we all come across various obstacles which can destroy our goals and dreams. Obstacles are often seen as brick walls ,but we never consider that there is always an entrance gate. An entrance gate for which we might have to struggle to find ,but no matter what it will always there. As it is often said God will never give you more than you can handle, and he will be the one that will give you a pat on the back to encourage you to continue your search. Brick walls were made to make us stronger not to destroy us. The search might be long and painful but without the entrance gate the white house will never be reached.
As Friedrich Nietzsche quoted "that which does not kill us makes us stronger." Although obstacles were designed to make us stronger, there is a possibility that they can kill us. Nietzsche's quote reveals the risk of destruction provoked by obstacles. Only those who are strong enough to overcome obstacles and find the entrance gate will succeed. Darwin's theory of survival says, "only the fittest organisms will prevail and will set standards of justice to the detriment of the weak." Darwin's theory reaffirms that those who are weak will live to be ruled by those who are strong enough to find the entrance gate.
When the child had decided that his long journey had been in vain and he would never be able to find the entrance to the white house he heard a voice calling his name. Encouraging him to continue his search. He stood up and wiped his tears off with the sleeve of his blue sweater. He walked toward the nearest corner of the brick wall. he walked still with disappointment on his shoulders but willing to continue. To his surprise after only walking a few steps, just around the corner was the big entrance gate. Open as if it had been waiting for him to find it. He looked up and tears began to drop realizing that being so close he was about to give up. He was about to give up the opportunity to progress.