Undergraduate / 'the influence that my sister has on me' - texas common app. essay [3]

Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.

Mothers are said to be one of the most influential persons in one's life. They support their children in every step of the way. Throughout my life, my sister, Rosalie, has always been a positive woman and the mother figure that always gives me advice. My mother named me after her, which brought on the feeling of imminence. Being a widow made Rosalie the "man" of the house. She is the main breadwinner of my family, working tireless hours on a minimum wage in order to provide for my family. Living around her taught me the importance of being independent and responsible, two qualities that will guide me for the rest of my life.

My journey started back home in Lusaka, Zambia, on a day in which the weather was hot and humid. The sun was setting and the streets were dangerously dark, due to the lack of streetlights. Most people returned to their homes early, especially women, no one wanted to be caught outside in the dark. My sister, full of confidence, decided to come to my mother's house. She had good news that could not wait another day. She came home with some documents that, at twelve years of age did not make sense to me. By the look on her face, I could see that she'd had a very long day. As she walked in the house, she asked to talk to our mother about something very important. After a long conversation, our mother approached me and told me that Rosalie had asked to be my legal guardian and add me as her dependent on her application to immigrate in the United States. My mother was over joyed by the opportunity of two of her children moving to a country filled with so many promises. I was a little hesitant at the thought of moving to a new country and leaving the rest of my family behind. Even though it was a very hard to decision to make at the age of twelve, I realized that it was the best for my family.

When we moved to the United States, Rosalie became the mother figure for me. My sister did not know anyone in the US, but she managed to take care of my four cousins and me. Without knowing how to speak English, she found herself a job and became independent. She did not have our mother living minutes away from her anymore. She did not have anyone to give her advice on her decisions. I admired her courage and wisdom. Rosalie became my hero and the person that I went to whenever I had a problem. She taught me to become the young woman that I am today. She helped become independent by letting me make my own choices. She offered me advice but she never tried to influence my decisions, she wanted me to learn from my mistakes.

No words could describe the influence that my sister has on me. She is the reason that I live in this country where freedom is granted and is full of opportunities. Without her act of kindness, I would have been in Zambia struggling to pay for my high school tuition. She has shown me that one does not have to be dependent on anyone to become successful.

ps. i need help with sentence stature