Undergraduate / Dicrimination with haircuts-rochester supplement [2]

HI guys, this is my Rochester supplement...the prompt is: Meliora: 'Ever better' - The University's motto, Meliora, directs our focus toward continual improvement through research, understanding, and collaborative efforts. Offer an example from your personal experience of an obstacle you faced or a problem you identified. Describe the actions you took and the result.

I had never been discriminated against before. Therefore, you can imagine my shock upon being refused a haircut the first time I visited a salon outside of my locality. The proprietor's brief remark to me had been, "Your kind isn't welcome here". I think it was the way in which he enunciated the word "kind" that really incurred my outrage. Naïve as I had been to the cruel workings of the world, I was simply unable to comprehend how my forefathers' lack of a birthright could have any deleterious implications. Thus, I seated myself on one of the chairs and adamantly refused to leave until they had cut my hair. After an eternity of glares, protestations, and even some shoves, the proprietor finally acceded and grudgingly allowed one of the barbers to cut my hair.

I won't claim that my impulsive outcry eventually led to the eradication of discrimination from our streets. Nor will I insist that I have, in any way, alleviated the sufferings of the oppressed. However, as I saw others of my "kind" staring at me through the doors of the salon, I knew that I had succeeded in showing them that every man can have his claim to equality if he is willing to stand up for himself.

What do you guys think?? Does this incident answer the prompt well enough??? Thanks in advance and i will be sure to check out your essays...