Undergraduate / 'Poor Papaw' - Common App essay. Important Person topic [4]

This is my second rough draft of the essay.

This is a story about one of the most influential people in life- my grandfather, or Papaw as I knew him. Papaw lived in Florida and passed away last March. I shared the following vignette in the eulogy I spoke at his funeral.

Last summer, I was 16 and quite proud to have landed my first job working in for a computer networking company in downtown Dallas. I had to leave our family vacation early to start the new job. Mom needed to stay with the family and Dad had to travel for business, which meant the only way for me to work would have been to stay alone while driving 40 miles roundtrip. Once Papaw found out about the situation, he decided to travel to Texas to stay with me to make sure I would be able to safely start my first job.

When he arrived, it was obvious he didn't feel well. I didn't make much of it; Papaw was diagnosed long ago with a rare, life-threatening disease called Wegener's Granulomatosis. But this time seemed different-worse- than I was used to. And he went downhill from there. As night came, I grew scared. I was a teenager, home alone with his chronically ill grandpa, who seemed to be getting sicker, and sicker. As I went to bed I kept going over in my head the quickest way to an Emergency Room. Thankfully, Papaw made it through the night without incident and I was able take him to the nearby Urgent Care in the morning. They prescribed him medicine that enabled him to travel safely back to Florida.

Later, I learned that Papaw was already feeling poorly when he made plans to be with me. At first this made me angry. If he wasn't healthy then why had he traveled? He had he put his health at risk, and scared me half to death. But as I reflected, I've come to the conclusion that this story is really the essence of who Papaw was. He flew to me to make sure that I was safe, even though it. Papaw knew that his time on earth was limited, so he wanted to spend it with people he loved and help not only his son, but encourage me in my first job. When I began to see his decision this way, my feelings quickly changed. How could I be angry with this man who was willing to sacrifice his comfort for me?

Papaw never really did get well from that incident and he ended up passing away in March. I learned so much from Papaw. He had so many cards stacked against him, but he lived his life with a selflessness unseen in most people. It is that selflessness that impacts me the most. Whenever I think of what I want to do for the rest of my life, no matter how hard I try to shake it, an image of myself working at a clinic in Africa always pops into my mind. The idea of being able to go to place that severely needs help, and being able to provide that help, is a part of who I am. In a way, that desire to help others is my constant reminder of the man who never stopped serving others.

Any critiques would be welcomed.