Undergraduate / I sought out ways to excel in an Economic academic setting; Why you want to transfer? [3]

Hi everyone. First time posting and hope someone can help with some of my ideas. The prompt is the general common app one of "why you want to transfer"

So here goes! :x

As a fresh-faced, driven, and focused student matriculating at [school], I sought out ways to excel in an Economic academic setting. I threw myself into a myriad of activities, clubs, and social functions that satisfied my thirst for academic improvement while preparing myself for a career in Law. Yet, as the semesters progressed -along with unfortunate circumstances that repeatedly caused me to step away from my education in order to support myself financially- I slowly found that my true passion in life was not Economics, but Chemistry.

Chemistry offers me the intellectual drive that no other subject can stimulate on a comparable level. I often find myself lost for hours reading and researching Chemistry and its different applications; yet, with each hour spent captivated by the vast world of Chemistry, a looming doubt grew deep within me. Though [school] is a great liberal arts college that specializes in Government and Economics, I found myself starving every second for a strongly developed Chemistry department that focused on research and offered a multitude of varied chemistry courses to its students.

I was thrilled to finally know what I wanted to pursue educationally, but forced myself to set aside these dreams because so much time had passed since I first entered college and I needed to graduate. Yet, when I found myself this past summer restrained to a bed in the ICU- just barely awakening from a 20 day medically induced coma- fighting for my life against Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus aureus pneumonia with a 2% chance of survival, I knew I had to pursue what I wanted in life. My entire perspective on life was changed because of my ordeal, and though my academic record has its gaps and marks for which I am responsible for, I am fully committed and driven to study what truly drives me to excel academically: Chemistry.

My illness had completely destroyed me, physically and mentally, and I no longer had the discipline nor concentration to even read a page in a book. I was physically and academically unprepared to study. I spent months recovering, pushing myself to regain what I lost due to muscle atrophy while mentally training as well. I even enrolled at my local community college in an accelerated yearlong Chemistry course taught in a semester. I was nervous about my ability to keep up with the demanding schedule, but as each week passed, I grew confident in my capability as a student to thrive in such an environment while even tutoring my fellow classmates.

By transferring, I would like to attend a university that will allow me to explore and develop my passion for Chemistry. I want to become an integrated part of a scientific community where students share my passion for the sciences while using its applications to help the surrounding community. That is why I believe that transferring to an institution with a strong Chemistry department that affords undergraduate research opportunities to its students with amazing professors is the foundation I need to grow and advance my intellectual passion as a student.

It still needs work, but hopefully I'm on the right track. Thanks again!