Writing Feedback / "If at first you don't succeed, try and try again" - TOEFL essay [9]

"If at first you don't succeed, try and try again"
Our life consists of the high and lows. I believe that people should try, try again even if they haven't succeeded at first. There are three reasons why we should never give up. Firstly, while you are alive everything is possible. The only valid reason why you can give up is a death. As long as you live (healthy and free), you have a choice to make a final attempt to succeed. Secondly, be realistic. Possibility to master something from the first try is very small. Everything requires time. In order to learn it you will make mistakes. Be strong. You are stronger than you think. One failure is not enough to stop from pursuing our dreams. Even 10, and 1000 failures are not enough. By refusing to give up, you encourage people. Who knows what somebody could achieve by looking at you as a role model. Frequently, when ready to give up, you are very close to make a huge breakthrough. At any moment you're on the verge of success. Do not give up even if the first attempt wasn't fortunate.