Undergraduate / 'It is something extra' - Personal Statement (the European Business School London) [9]

Can someone Please review this Personal statement and give me some feedback ..all help is greatly appreciated.

"Please provide us with a personal statement of 300-500 words outlining your reasons for applying to your chosen course at the European Business School London":

With all the many different schools out there to choose from, I specifically knew what I wanted. I was in search for something extra; an institution that would give me more than just a mediocre overview of International Event management; it was hardly the Eeny, meeny, miny mo situation given the importance of this major stepping stone in life. Nevertheless, after searching far and wide, I feel that narrowing my choice to the European Business School London (EBSL) is the right decision for me. EBSL's employment rate alone speaks for itself not to mention the list of top tier companies that employ EBSL graduates. Subsequent to my extensive research on your institution, I found some of the more alluring elements of EBSL to be its student diversity, its focus on the importance of teaching different languages, and its locality. All of these elements make my goal of one day being a respected dominant force in this industry become much more attainable.

EBSL's eclectic array of students makes it a haven for fostering new and exciting friendships, not to mention the business contacts from all around the globe. In my search for the appropriate school, I also found that EBSL was the only institution that made languages a top priority in its curriculum. Globalism is important; we need to see the "big" picture and have a global outlook on business In order to succeed prosper in the 21st century. I have always been fascinated by different cultures and yearned to know different languages. This trait was demonstrated with an honorary award I received in primary school for excellence in language; and while other students were poking fun at the pupils from foreign countries for being different, I would naturally be drawn to make friends with them. This just goes to show my interest in different languages and cultures has long been rooted in me. So in effect to fuel this fire of a passion, I wish to study Portuguese when I arrive at EBSL.

Events bringing people together have also been dear to me; as a child I always helped my parents in setting up family holiday parties; even on special occasions when they did not have anything planned, I would take it upon myself to create a menu for what we would be feasting on that evening, then call family and friends to invite them over for a night of dancing and food. In addition to the aforementioned, I relish the thought of making London my new home for the next few years. Even though my time in Europe was short-lived; the time spent there was very much an eye-opening experience. The different cultures and ideas left me wanting more like a hungry bloke in a buffet. Hailing from Miami, a major hodgepodge in the states; I don't get easily impressed by diverse cities which say's a lot about London which more-less left me in awe. Having said that there is nothing more I would like than studying in the great melting pot. Optimistically, upon entering the business foundation course, I look forward to taking full advantage of the fast track option offered by the school. In accordance with my chosen language of study; while attending EBSL, I wish to partake in the Study Period Abroad programme in fascinating emerging market of Brazil. Clearly leaving my "comfort" zone to go study in London will not be easy; however, my drive to succeed coupled with my will to run a successful premier International event Management Company will ensure that I not only reach my expectation in my studies, but surpass them as well.