Haydi
Mar 23, 2014
Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay: How does advertising influence people's behaviour? [5]
Hello, this is my first essay here.
I've recently started to prepare for TOEFL, here you have a result. I will be very grateful for every comment and correction.
How does advertising influence people's behaviour? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.
On the market today we can observe a real race between particular sectors and countless brands. Since there is such a variety of products and services, the only way to stand out from other, nearly the same things, companies need to be noticed and try to promote themselves any possible way. In my opinion, advertising influence people's behaviour negatively because it almost deprives us of free and conscious will while choosing what to spend money on.
Firstly, it is obvious that better commercial does not always equals better product. In most cases it only shows which company is wealthier or which has a smarter advertising team and copywriters. But we usually swallow the bait and buy something just because we saw it on a billboard, instead of checking what it contains or if we could find a better-quality, cheaper version of it.
What is more, well-made commercials can make us buy things which we do not even need. Suddenly we begin to wonder how we were able to survive without a given product and we are sure that after buying it, our life become easier. We spend lots of money on unnecessary things only because of their advertisements.
And the final, most scary stage of advertising influence is its impact on people's unconsciousness. TV commercials, billboards, posters, all those eye-catchers on websites, slogans and jingles - they all imprint on our memory and therefore somehow control our choices, condition the way we think and perceive the world. Like in Huxley's "Brave New World" but few actually ask the question in what direction it goes.
To conclude, I think that advertising has a bad influence on people's behaviour and the market itself. People are being forced to buy superfluous product or services and at the same time numerous valuable companies can be underrated and their offers wasted.
Hello, this is my first essay here.
I've recently started to prepare for TOEFL, here you have a result. I will be very grateful for every comment and correction.
How does advertising influence people's behaviour? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.
On the market today we can observe a real race between particular sectors and countless brands. Since there is such a variety of products and services, the only way to stand out from other, nearly the same things, companies need to be noticed and try to promote themselves any possible way. In my opinion, advertising influence people's behaviour negatively because it almost deprives us of free and conscious will while choosing what to spend money on.
Firstly, it is obvious that better commercial does not always equals better product. In most cases it only shows which company is wealthier or which has a smarter advertising team and copywriters. But we usually swallow the bait and buy something just because we saw it on a billboard, instead of checking what it contains or if we could find a better-quality, cheaper version of it.
What is more, well-made commercials can make us buy things which we do not even need. Suddenly we begin to wonder how we were able to survive without a given product and we are sure that after buying it, our life become easier. We spend lots of money on unnecessary things only because of their advertisements.
And the final, most scary stage of advertising influence is its impact on people's unconsciousness. TV commercials, billboards, posters, all those eye-catchers on websites, slogans and jingles - they all imprint on our memory and therefore somehow control our choices, condition the way we think and perceive the world. Like in Huxley's "Brave New World" but few actually ask the question in what direction it goes.
To conclude, I think that advertising has a bad influence on people's behaviour and the market itself. People are being forced to buy superfluous product or services and at the same time numerous valuable companies can be underrated and their offers wasted.
