Undergraduate / It's university where I can expand my innovative and creative ideas - My Yale supplemental essays [3]

Hi everyone, I need help with wording and grammar. Please help! Feel free to comment on anything that doesn't have to do with grammar or wording. I also need help coming up with more "creative and clever answers. Thank you!!!

What in particular about Yale has influenced your decision to apply? 100 word max.
I want to attend a university where I will have the support to expand my innovative and creative ideas, Yale is that university. Currently, I have begun to start up my own non-profit organization. As a high school student, I have very limited resources. However, at Yale I will have all the necessary assets for my social venture to thrive. Being a part of the Net Impact club will allow me to explore social entrepreneurship, create a positive return on society, have networking opportunities, and contribute to it's vehicle for change mission.

What excites you intellectually, really? 250 CHARACTERS MAX.
Over the summer, I was became very interested in social theory and cultural analysis, while I was in Merida, Yucatan. There, I perceived the different cultures that seemed to differ one another, yet were so similar. I contemplated at the idea of the two worlds that I, a Mexican-American belong to.

Think about a disappointment you have experienced. What was your response? 250 CHARACTER MAX.
I received my first "C" on a math test my Junior year. My hateful feeling toward math grew, but decided to stay for tutoring after school at least two days per week. Eventually, I began to master the content and tutored students. I soon fell in love with math, and got straight A's on all tests from then on.

Suite-style living - four to six students sharing a set of rooms - may be an integral part of your Yale College experience. What would you contribute to the dynamic of your suite? 250 CHARACTER MAX.

My belief that laughter is a daily ritual. For me, a day is not merely complete without a full set of giggles.

What do you wish you were better at being or doing? 250 CHARACTER MAX.
Drawing. In class, my art teacher hands out blank sheets of paper, and instructs us to sketch. I attempt to draw complex shapes to make up for my lack of artistic talent. I glance at my peer's papers and see perfect representations of scenery or people. I look down at mine and find a simple stick figure.

Undergraduate / Let your struggles become your motivation - Common App Prompt 1 Essay [4]

This is the first draft for the Common App Prompt #1 (biographical essay). I have written about 450/650 word limit, so I have space to add more information/detail.

"Promise me you'll be someone in life, so you don't have to pass through these hardships" they said, "promise" I always replied. From ages zero to thirteen, I traveled from hospital to hospital, with my parents and brother, in the back of our run-down 99' Ford Windstar.

By the age of six, I was so accustomed to the familiar routine that broke down into three simple steps: A) Hear my father's excruciating cries in the middle of the night. B) Pretend to sleep while my mother carried my brother and I to our van, after snatching us from our bedrooms. C) Cover my ears with my blanket, attempting to muffle my mother's desperate cries as we crossed the border.

From there, the routine would shatter. The hospital location would always differ, but the situation remained the same. At age 34, my father had his first inguinal hernia surgery. A few months later, he had another, and then another, and then another... It was an endless cycle of crossing the border, in hope of finding an inexpensive doctor who could not only repair his strangulated hernia, but who could also ensure that it would never become strangulated again.

My family eventually hit rock-bottom when I was eleven. I didn't notice at first, but I gradually became aware of the different house I seemed to live in. Both my parents were unemployed, my father couldn't walk, and I didn't get play with him at the park. For the next six months, I resided with a mother and father whose depression seized the household.

Despite our infinite struggles, my parents insisted that I do well in school. Being immigrants from Mexico impeded them from being able to read my English homework, but they always made sure it was completed. My parents even drove extra miles in order to ensure that I received the best education possible.

It was during my Junior year, when I thought I would fail them. I hesitated taking all honors classes, specifically in math, since the content seemed rigorous and impossible to understand. Many students dropped out within the first week. Keeping my parents' struggles and hopes in mind, I stayed in the class and spent my afternoons in the tutoring lounge, determined to master the content. By the end of the year, I had received an A on all my tests.

As I look back at the situations I have lived, from watching my father almost die, to not knowing when my next meal was, I never let them become an obstacle in my life. I thank my parents, my true inspirations, for instilling in me the best motto in life: "let your struggles become your motivations".