Writing Feedback / "The people in power have created an obesity epidemic" - but not only rich countries are exposed now [3]

A wise man namely Roman Atkins once said "The people in power have created an obesity epidemic." It is true that obesity has been considered as a major problem in high-income countries but today both the developed and developing countries are facing this same severe crisis. In 1997, World Health Organization (WHO) recognized obesity as a global epidemic and I would like to jot down this not-quite-shocking fact, there are more than 337 000 deaths attributable to obesity per year and the statistic is not looking any better. Now we are aware and informed that obesity kills thousands but how exactly we could stop it? The most vital thing is we should study the causes of the problem, obesity. Through research, there are three main sources of obesity; poor diet, lack of physical activities and genetics.

Poor diet, what about it? It is all about our food consumption. What foods we consume and how we consume them. The first problem related to poor diet is a very bad habit that is somehow taken as okay in society, overeating. In this cruel world where people tend to spend less money for quality food, we choose a poor dietary choice just because we have this false belief, quantity over quality. Foods especially fast food meals are served in enormous portion as a hoax in marketing. It attracts people, easily. This evil plan works, more people go to fast food restaurants. More people get their hands on those extremely large burgers and fries. Unfortunately, it also means more people are getting closer to the threat of becoming obese.

The second cause of obesity would be the lack of physical activities done in everyday life. Despite all the benefits of doing physical activities through various researches, people are not fully convinced and they still spend their leisure time on non-physical activities...

This is an unfinished, rough essay. I posted it here to get some reviews of my writing; the weaknesses and area which I can improve. Kindly reply. I am expecting your reviews. Yoroshiku!