takerisk
Aug 26, 2015
Writing Feedback / [Toefl] extended family continue importance [2]
Please, I would be grateful if someone corrected my spelling and grammar mistakes.
The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than it was in the past
I would not exactly say that extended family is less important today than in the past. Even in these days people complain that they do not have time to visit family than the past I am positive that extended family continue being as important as they were in the past.
Even though people work more and friends have more importance in our life than the past I think that Skype and Facebook help to keep family ties fastened. For example, when I was young my best friend was my cousin. I vividly remember that we used to play soccer and fly a kite in my house. When he graduated, he decided to move to the United States to work. However, our friendship continue strong because we use to talk on Skype and Facebook. On the other hand, if we had borned 50 years ago we would not keep in touch like today. To clarify, at that time internet had not been invented and to make international call was so expensive.
Distances have been shortened with better freeways, cars and airplanes. I live in Brazil, which is a big country. To illustrate, to visit a parent who lives in other state we take 8 hours by car or 1 hour by airplane at least. Today, traveling by airplane is cheaper because airplanes are bigger and more modern. Similarly, car and freeways are more modern and people can travel great distances with more comfort than the past. For example, my aunts, uncles my parents are very united even living in different states. For instance, we used to meet once a year in Rio de Janeiro at the end of the year to celebrate Christmas and New Year. Despite of the past, when this would be much difficult because long trips used to be expensive and unpleasant.
To conclude, today extended family is not less important. Even families living in different countries can be united and friendly owing to the development of technology. Besides that, today face-to-face meeting was affordable because airplane trips were cheaper.
Please, I would be grateful if someone corrected my spelling and grammar mistakes.
The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than it was in the past
I would not exactly say that extended family is less important today than in the past. Even in these days people complain that they do not have time to visit family than the past I am positive that extended family continue being as important as they were in the past.
Even though people work more and friends have more importance in our life than the past I think that Skype and Facebook help to keep family ties fastened. For example, when I was young my best friend was my cousin. I vividly remember that we used to play soccer and fly a kite in my house. When he graduated, he decided to move to the United States to work. However, our friendship continue strong because we use to talk on Skype and Facebook. On the other hand, if we had borned 50 years ago we would not keep in touch like today. To clarify, at that time internet had not been invented and to make international call was so expensive.
Distances have been shortened with better freeways, cars and airplanes. I live in Brazil, which is a big country. To illustrate, to visit a parent who lives in other state we take 8 hours by car or 1 hour by airplane at least. Today, traveling by airplane is cheaper because airplanes are bigger and more modern. Similarly, car and freeways are more modern and people can travel great distances with more comfort than the past. For example, my aunts, uncles my parents are very united even living in different states. For instance, we used to meet once a year in Rio de Janeiro at the end of the year to celebrate Christmas and New Year. Despite of the past, when this would be much difficult because long trips used to be expensive and unpleasant.
To conclude, today extended family is not less important. Even families living in different countries can be united and friendly owing to the development of technology. Besides that, today face-to-face meeting was affordable because airplane trips were cheaper.