Posts by jamesbvaughan

jamesbvaughan

Nov 12, 2015

Undergraduate / ¨In the Face of Adversity...¨-VCU CommonApp Essay [5]

That's the main reason why I was told to think of a different experience, or at least describe it in a way that shows more about my positive work ethic than the fact that I failed in the end. I was going to write about coming out like Mary said (I'm transgender), but I already wrote my personal long essay about realizing I was trans, and I wanted to show them something else about me. Other than that, I don't have a whole lot of experiences that stand out to me as one I could write about which is a problem.

I do have a rough draft of another experience to write about; the time when I woke up with my depression coming back on the day of my AP Lang exam. But even then, it feels like there isn't enough substance to talk about it (or depression in itself is too broad a topic).

Thank yu for the advice and the corrections though, everyone. I think that I may keep the experience that I've written, but I'might try and see if I can tweak it to be more positive and more about the leadership role I took and how much work/dedication it took to complete it (and make it seem that it was the school's fault that we didn't have a trailer, not a failure on my part, which it wasn't). In actuality, we worked hard on it and I led most of that work. That's the angle I wanted to approach it from, but I guess it comes off as more negative.

It's also hard to try and fit the experience in only 250 words.

jamesbvaughan

Nov 11, 2015

Undergraduate / ¨In the Face of Adversity...¨-VCU CommonApp Essay [5]

Hi all, I'm applying to Virginia Commonwealth University and could use a few tips on how my essay is so far. I've gotten mixed reviews from others, some even (strongly) recommending that I scrap it and rewrite the whole thing. Hope you guys can help. It's still a rough draft but I'm coming close to my application deadline.

Describe a challenging situation you've faced. Briefly state the situation, how you responded and why, would you have done anything differently, has it affected or shaped who you are today? (100-250 words)

As co-president of my school's gay-straight alliance Spectrum, we, as a club are expected to perform in the Homecoming parade prior to the game. It is tradition to create a float. The other co-president and I along with several members slaved for about a month after school: brainstorming, painting, building, and rehearsing. After repeating this process for 1-2 hours every day, including weekends, we had finally finished preparing a float and a routine. On the day of the Homecoming game, we were informed that we did not have a trailer. Stress levels mounted until the other co-president began wildly improvising, attaching this to that using only duct tape. It was then that I decided to walk out of the project. Many would consider this rude, however, my response warrants an explanation: it was not fun anymore. It was more stress than reward and, as it is only the beginning of the year and many of our members are freshmen, I did not want to give an unreasonable amount of stress and expectations for a club designed to create a safe space. This experience has taught me when it is acceptable to admit an overload of stress, even if that requires abandoning a long-term project; for me, it was never about winning a float contest or even getting recognition as a club. The experience of working and getting to know and help others on a personal level and having fun doing so served as a reward in itself.