Great Gatsby and The American Dream, Intro and concluding paragraph for grade 11 essay.

PROMPT
Intro: construct a thesis that identifies what Fitzgerald message is related to one of the following: money, hypocrisy or the american dream
Concluding: What is the significance of the message? So what?

Intro "The Great Gatsby" is a novel by Scott Fitzgerald, Gatsby is a dreamer who lives extravagantly, but grows up poor. The american dream is coming to the United States for freedom, and opportunity to have a decent, well deserved life. "The Great Gatsby" shows the modern version of the american dream, building up to extreme wealth, exactly what happens to Jay Gatsby. Fitzgerald's eventual message about the american dream is that it is all a lie, Gatsby resorts to murder to achieve the "dream".

Concluding The american dream, as portrayed by Fitzgerald, has been tarnished. Although Gatsby achieves the "dream", he does it through unspeakable, not to mention criminal acts. The true american dream is supposed to be about working hard for a moderately good life that is earned; the altered modern day american dream is becoming extremely wealthy. Gatsby is a dreamer who ends up wealthy, but ultimately his achievement of the modern american dream is his downfall.

Any help is appreciated thank you!! :)

The intro should be like this The Great Gatsby is a 1925 novel written by American author F. Scott Fitzgerald; Gatsby is a dreamer....

You've good theme to explain the prompt. I've few suggestions

---You should use American dream not american dream and American or Americans instade of america.
----Scott Fitzgerald, Gatsby is a dreamer--- Fitzgerald; Gatsby is
----extravagantly, but ----extravagantly but
----and opportunity to have a decent, well deserved life.----and an opportunity to have a decent, well-deserved life.
----Fitzgerald's eventual message about the---- Fitzgerald's overall or ultimate message about the..
---The true American dream is supposed to----The real American dream is supposed to
----American dream is becoming extremely wealthy. Gatsby is a dreamer who ends up wealthy, ------American dream is becoming extremely wealthy. Gatsby is a dreamer who ends up rich,----- I think wealthy is overused here.