irisyuki
Oct 24, 2017
Writing Feedback / Living in a big city is more convenient and easily to find better jobs than in a suburban area [6]
In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays, most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community?
There are always 2 main areas which is contrary with each other in every country: suburban and big city. Tens of years ago, a large of number people spent their whole life in a small home village. But today, most of them live in bigger and modern cities. As the results, there are different experiences in each place.
In my view, people would be received some benefits if they stayed in a small society. Firstly, they knew each other very well. They could believe in their neighbors because they understood them very clearly. They would feel safe and the crime rate was very low. Secondly, everyone could help their neighbors when necessary. The children always had someone to look after, or if you went out, your next-door friend kept your delivery goods and watched out your house. Finally, in a small group, everyone was very closed and you never felt lonely. They usually held small gatherings, parties every week to make this relationship be cohesive. The life here is simple but happy.
However, there were many difficult if people just lived here. Almost the villages were very poor without convenient infrastructures: modern hospitals, internet services,... Also, because of the undeveloped traffic and the large distance, it took many hours to go to the nearest schools, factories, especially hospital and police station in emergency situations. Besides, in suburban, agriculture occupies the majority, so every family had financial problems. Only young people could go to big cities to have more opportunities. Finally, because of the small views, their knowledge and relationship was very limited.
In conclusion, I think these disadvantages are outweigh advantages. Nowadays, with the development of technology, living in a big city is more convenient and easily to find better jobs. But if you want, you can also make a suitable small community with your neighbors.
Please help me to check the grammar, usage and ideas for this essay of task 2 ielts writing.Thank you so much!
In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays, most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community?
The advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community
There are always 2 main areas which is contrary with each other in every country: suburban and big city. Tens of years ago, a large of number people spent their whole life in a small home village. But today, most of them live in bigger and modern cities. As the results, there are different experiences in each place.
In my view, people would be received some benefits if they stayed in a small society. Firstly, they knew each other very well. They could believe in their neighbors because they understood them very clearly. They would feel safe and the crime rate was very low. Secondly, everyone could help their neighbors when necessary. The children always had someone to look after, or if you went out, your next-door friend kept your delivery goods and watched out your house. Finally, in a small group, everyone was very closed and you never felt lonely. They usually held small gatherings, parties every week to make this relationship be cohesive. The life here is simple but happy.
However, there were many difficult if people just lived here. Almost the villages were very poor without convenient infrastructures: modern hospitals, internet services,... Also, because of the undeveloped traffic and the large distance, it took many hours to go to the nearest schools, factories, especially hospital and police station in emergency situations. Besides, in suburban, agriculture occupies the majority, so every family had financial problems. Only young people could go to big cities to have more opportunities. Finally, because of the small views, their knowledge and relationship was very limited.
In conclusion, I think these disadvantages are outweigh advantages. Nowadays, with the development of technology, living in a big city is more convenient and easily to find better jobs. But if you want, you can also make a suitable small community with your neighbors.
Please help me to check the grammar, usage and ideas for this essay of task 2 ielts writing.Thank you so much!