siatina
Feb 10, 2019
Writing Feedback / In your opinion, what are the advantages and disadvantages of being a member in a large family? [7]
The more economy develops, the less large family appear. Large family just exists in the past, however, It still has both advantages and disadvantages.
A large family always a happy family. When parents have many children, they no longer think about the divorce. Being parents always have many pressures, but our children can make us have more determination and efforts in both their life and job. I will be happier and It will lead to the progress in my economy, it will also play an irreplaceable role in mental development.
Moreover, when parents become older and retire, besides pension, we can count on our children. The children grow, finish college and have a job means their parents' happiness and pride. Children will look after their parents when they need and when parents pass away, the will come into the poverty their parents and ancestor left for them.
However, the more children we have, the more money we need. The society is changing, therefore, the living standard is keeping higher. Parents cannot afford education, food and demand for children. It's hard to pay attention to each individual member in such a large familly, It also leads to the arguments between the children.
In my opinion, I feel like to have many children. It may lead to many disadavantages in life, but If we are united, nothing may threaten to us.
I'm a new member and would you please correct my essay and give me some feedback? From 0 to 3, my essay is at which points?
Thank you very much.
A large family is a happy family
The more economy develops, the less large family appear. Large family just exists in the past, however, It still has both advantages and disadvantages.
A large family always a happy family. When parents have many children, they no longer think about the divorce. Being parents always have many pressures, but our children can make us have more determination and efforts in both their life and job. I will be happier and It will lead to the progress in my economy, it will also play an irreplaceable role in mental development.
Moreover, when parents become older and retire, besides pension, we can count on our children. The children grow, finish college and have a job means their parents' happiness and pride. Children will look after their parents when they need and when parents pass away, the will come into the poverty their parents and ancestor left for them.
However, the more children we have, the more money we need. The society is changing, therefore, the living standard is keeping higher. Parents cannot afford education, food and demand for children. It's hard to pay attention to each individual member in such a large familly, It also leads to the arguments between the children.
In my opinion, I feel like to have many children. It may lead to many disadavantages in life, but If we are united, nothing may threaten to us.
I'm a new member and would you please correct my essay and give me some feedback? From 0 to 3, my essay is at which points?
Thank you very much.