zlb20187515
Apr 17, 2019
Writing Feedback / Improving people's health by cleaning the environment. TOEFL writing [4]
Please give me some suggestions for my article
Topic:
The most important way to improve people's health is to clean the environment.
Some people think the most important way to improve people's health is to clean the environment, but some people insist on the opposite, in the opinion of my I agree with the second view.
First, improve people's health by clean the environment maybe is a good way. Clean the environment can let people have healthy food and fresh air, there are some factory that will produce polluted water that contaminated the environment, if people drink water that had been contaminated, they maybe get sick and have an unhealthy, people maybe feel better when the environment is clean. When you look out the window, you will most likely feel better if you see a green park then a grey factory that was producing waste gases, your body will also get healthier if you feel good. Clean the environment do counting as an away improve people's health.
Second, people's health can get better if the environment is clean, but if you want to clean the environment, it is not an easy task it takes a lot of money. the most important reason that affects people's health is coal, most factory and family use coal as energy source simply because is cheap, but it will produce a lot of waste gas, that affect people's health, the government need to put a lot of money to change energy source without affecting other people's benefit. the government also need money to clean the pollution from the water, it also takes money to do it it will make the city's economy lags behind other cities, the people's living standard will be lower and it will also affect people's health.
Third, there is also a better way to improve people's health. like what I say in my second point it will take so many money to clean the environment, if the government put the money on the free Gym and boost the mass to do more exercises, it will surely make people's health better, for example, I have a friend who has a very weak body, his father tall hem to go to Gym to run on the machine, after half a year, his body get to a good condition, now he is training muscles.
In conclusion, the best way to improve people's health is to set more free Gym instead to clean the environment.
Clean Water & Air for better health?
Please give me some suggestions for my article
Topic:
The most important way to improve people's health is to clean the environment.
Some people think the most important way to improve people's health is to clean the environment, but some people insist on the opposite, in the opinion of my I agree with the second view.
First, improve people's health by clean the environment maybe is a good way. Clean the environment can let people have healthy food and fresh air, there are some factory that will produce polluted water that contaminated the environment, if people drink water that had been contaminated, they maybe get sick and have an unhealthy, people maybe feel better when the environment is clean. When you look out the window, you will most likely feel better if you see a green park then a grey factory that was producing waste gases, your body will also get healthier if you feel good. Clean the environment do counting as an away improve people's health.
Second, people's health can get better if the environment is clean, but if you want to clean the environment, it is not an easy task it takes a lot of money. the most important reason that affects people's health is coal, most factory and family use coal as energy source simply because is cheap, but it will produce a lot of waste gas, that affect people's health, the government need to put a lot of money to change energy source without affecting other people's benefit. the government also need money to clean the pollution from the water, it also takes money to do it it will make the city's economy lags behind other cities, the people's living standard will be lower and it will also affect people's health.
Third, there is also a better way to improve people's health. like what I say in my second point it will take so many money to clean the environment, if the government put the money on the free Gym and boost the mass to do more exercises, it will surely make people's health better, for example, I have a friend who has a very weak body, his father tall hem to go to Gym to run on the machine, after half a year, his body get to a good condition, now he is training muscles.
In conclusion, the best way to improve people's health is to set more free Gym instead to clean the environment.