Posts by radixpower

radixpower

Apr 25, 2020

Scholarship / Australia Scholarship - How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resources [4]

Dear experts,

Please review my essay. Thanks and very appreciate it!

How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resource development needs?

As a financial services regulator, OJK has a long way to go in achieving its mission: Increasing micro-business contribution for national growth. The recent problem faced is most micro-business cannot grow optimally due to unsuitable loan features. Hence, I believe that the scholarship would give me an opportunity to mastering the finance and research skills to help OJK solve the problem. I plan to introduce improved loan features for micro-business in the agriculture and livestock sectors.

radixpower

Apr 25, 2020

Scholarship / Australia Scholarship - How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resources [4]

Hi Holt, thanks for the feedback. The limit is max. 500 characters, not words. Therefore, I'm struggling to explain in such a limited sentence.

This is for Australia Award Scholarship.

Please advise.

radixpower

Apr 25, 2020

Scholarship / Australia Scholarship - How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resources [4]

@holt

How about this version?

How will this scholarship contribute to the organisation's human resource development needs? [500 chars]
As I plan to study finance with this scholarship, my company (OJK) will benefit much regarding its mission to increase micro-business contribution for national growth. Over the last 5 years, OJK has been addressing the issue of micro-business stagnant growth due to a lack of access to financial services. By studying investment management in a reputable university, I will be focusing my research on improving loan and insurance features for micro-business in the agriculture and livestock sectors.