phgchi2102
May 10, 2020
Writing Feedback / WRITING TOEIC PART 3: Do you agree or disagree with the statement: It is important to work at a job [2]
I'm going to take a Toeic writing test this month and will really appreciate it if someone could check and give a comment to me so I can improve my skill.
Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the statement:
Choosing between a favorite or a high-paid job is always a challenge to anybody who concerns about their career. There is a belief that having an enjoyable job is much more important than earning a lot of money. In my opinion, I agree with this idea for the following reasons.
First, pursuing a job just for the financial purposes may damage your health both physically and mentally. You may put yourself in a begrudging situation when you have to work too hard in a field you dislike to have a high salary. Overworking in such an uncomfortable condition, therefore, will often lead to exhaustion and many illnesses such as diabetes or heart diseases. Additionally, you can even be stressed or depressed sometimes when you keep chasing something which is never enough like money.
Second, we all know that money cannot buy happiness. Despite the fact that money is important, it should not be an exclusive concern and prioritized in one's career. We should include other factors such as working environment, co-worker relationships and especially job satisfaction, which we can find more easily in a more suitable job. After all, being rich but fail in living a happy life is meaningless and a kind of tragic.
Third, you can be more productive and creative when doing a job you enjoy. It is believed that you will work more efficiently and will be more engaged in an environment that you feel comfortable. For example, an artist is more likely to come up with more unique and valued artworks when he works under passion rather than pressure. Thus, money can also come from an enjoyable job if we have motivation and try our best.
In conclusion, a satisfying job will bring about more benefit to people. It is not worth in trading a fulfilling and happy career just to earn some money.
I'm going to take a Toeic writing test this month and will really appreciate it if someone could check and give a comment to me so I can improve my skill.
Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the statement:
It is important to work at a job you enjoy than to earn a lot of money
.Choosing between a favorite or a high-paid job is always a challenge to anybody who concerns about their career. There is a belief that having an enjoyable job is much more important than earning a lot of money. In my opinion, I agree with this idea for the following reasons.
First, pursuing a job just for the financial purposes may damage your health both physically and mentally. You may put yourself in a begrudging situation when you have to work too hard in a field you dislike to have a high salary. Overworking in such an uncomfortable condition, therefore, will often lead to exhaustion and many illnesses such as diabetes or heart diseases. Additionally, you can even be stressed or depressed sometimes when you keep chasing something which is never enough like money.
Second, we all know that money cannot buy happiness. Despite the fact that money is important, it should not be an exclusive concern and prioritized in one's career. We should include other factors such as working environment, co-worker relationships and especially job satisfaction, which we can find more easily in a more suitable job. After all, being rich but fail in living a happy life is meaningless and a kind of tragic.
Third, you can be more productive and creative when doing a job you enjoy. It is believed that you will work more efficiently and will be more engaged in an environment that you feel comfortable. For example, an artist is more likely to come up with more unique and valued artworks when he works under passion rather than pressure. Thus, money can also come from an enjoyable job if we have motivation and try our best.
In conclusion, a satisfying job will bring about more benefit to people. It is not worth in trading a fulfilling and happy career just to earn some money.