Wendytrn96
Apr 25, 2021
Writing Feedback / Are the professional athletes ideal for the young people to follow? [2]
Hi everyone, I'm cultivating for my IELTS Academic Writing task 2, which means I have to write 250 words minimum. Your comments would be a great help for my improvement.
DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES MAKE GOOD ROLE MODELS FOR YOUNG PEOPLE?
SUPPORT YOUR OPINION WITH REASONS AND EXAMPLES FROM YOUR OWN KNOWLEDGE OR EXPERIENCE. (270 words)
Sport is an indispensable activity for human beings around the world. They are leisure strenuousness but also an occupation for a specific group of people which called an athlete. In my opinion, I have confidence in expert sportspeople that make duty prototypes for juniors.
Proficient athletes gain an enormous observation from young people everywhere in the world. Many teenagers or even children would like to follow their favorite players. When a child plays a sport, most of them have their preferred sportsperson desire themselves to be as good as their icon. Playing sport is not all about improving health, some sports even teach us solidarity means they train ourself to work under a team and play fair. Besides, professional athletes also represent the consequence of hard work to their followers. They are great living examples for industrious practice yields success. Many of them even receive high incomes from advertisements, being models, or running their own business. Because of their reputation, they effortlessly obtain attention without paying much amount for marketing.
Nevertheless, pro-players are not always good role, especially teenage athletes. Being financially comfortable as a juvenile makes them think that they can do what they wish for since penurious days. Great earning at a young age is a double-edged sword. Some of them concentrate on doing something to upgrade their property or helping unlucky circumstances. Some only spend their money extravagantly for partying overnight or under arrest because of rebellious behaviors.
To sum up, professional athletes may become good role models for young people as long as they focus on doing meaningful, and become ideal for the young to imitate.
Hi everyone, I'm cultivating for my IELTS Academic Writing task 2, which means I have to write 250 words minimum. Your comments would be a great help for my improvement.
DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES MAKE GOOD ROLE MODELS FOR YOUNG PEOPLE?
SUPPORT YOUR OPINION WITH REASONS AND EXAMPLES FROM YOUR OWN KNOWLEDGE OR EXPERIENCE. (270 words)
Sport is an indispensable activity for human beings around the world. They are leisure strenuousness but also an occupation for a specific group of people which called an athlete. In my opinion, I have confidence in expert sportspeople that make duty prototypes for juniors.
Proficient athletes gain an enormous observation from young people everywhere in the world. Many teenagers or even children would like to follow their favorite players. When a child plays a sport, most of them have their preferred sportsperson desire themselves to be as good as their icon. Playing sport is not all about improving health, some sports even teach us solidarity means they train ourself to work under a team and play fair. Besides, professional athletes also represent the consequence of hard work to their followers. They are great living examples for industrious practice yields success. Many of them even receive high incomes from advertisements, being models, or running their own business. Because of their reputation, they effortlessly obtain attention without paying much amount for marketing.
Nevertheless, pro-players are not always good role, especially teenage athletes. Being financially comfortable as a juvenile makes them think that they can do what they wish for since penurious days. Great earning at a young age is a double-edged sword. Some of them concentrate on doing something to upgrade their property or helping unlucky circumstances. Some only spend their money extravagantly for partying overnight or under arrest because of rebellious behaviors.
To sum up, professional athletes may become good role models for young people as long as they focus on doing meaningful, and become ideal for the young to imitate.