fzhongjie
Dec 18, 2009
Writing Feedback / IELTS composition G class Task1 (Fitness facilities renovation) [3]
Can anybody help me check this? If you are familiar with IELTS, please give me a score, please. Appreciate!
Directive: Fitness facilities renovation
Dear Sir,
My name is Jerry, a resident who has been living here for more than 10 years. I am writing now as a representative of my community to present some suggestions about the renovation plan of the resident sports centre. While we really appreciate the old centre here which has been benefiting us for more than 10 years, we want you to be aware that there are some disadvantages as you may see obviously. Along with the inhabitant growing in this area, old centre is becoming more and more crowded, especially in the weekend. But it isn't serious than the structure of the building, less floor and totally enclosed. People in this place are, therefore, expecting to have a complex with more stories and enough open space around. It will be a help for mitigating the intense situation in every weekend. Players can take advantage of the space to have field game, like tennis or soccer. We would appreciate if you could adopt our ideas. Hopefully we can see the new building soon.
Yours sincerely,
Jerry
177 words
Can anybody help me check this? If you are familiar with IELTS, please give me a score, please. Appreciate!
Directive: Fitness facilities renovation
Dear Sir,
My name is Jerry, a resident who has been living here for more than 10 years. I am writing now as a representative of my community to present some suggestions about the renovation plan of the resident sports centre. While we really appreciate the old centre here which has been benefiting us for more than 10 years, we want you to be aware that there are some disadvantages as you may see obviously. Along with the inhabitant growing in this area, old centre is becoming more and more crowded, especially in the weekend. But it isn't serious than the structure of the building, less floor and totally enclosed. People in this place are, therefore, expecting to have a complex with more stories and enough open space around. It will be a help for mitigating the intense situation in every weekend. Players can take advantage of the space to have field game, like tennis or soccer. We would appreciate if you could adopt our ideas. Hopefully we can see the new building soon.
Yours sincerely,
Jerry
177 words