Book Reports / the potrayal of women in a negative light - Hamlet, Thesis required [2]

Hello, I'm writing a hamlet essay on the potrayal of women in a negative light. So far my thesis is this:

"In William Shakespeare's misogynist play Hamlet, the only women are portrayed in a negative way due to the rudeness of the protagonists towards women, Gertrude and Ophelia's passion for murderers of their own loved ones, and their overall lack of clear sense of reality."

I am feeling that my 2nd and third point are two closely related so if somebody could help me change that and or make my thesis sound better would help greatly. Suppose to be grade 12 academic english level lol :S