billryu94
May 6, 2010
Writing Feedback / Growing up in a rural area provides an easy-going life pattern to children [3]
It is better for children to grow up in the countryside rather than in a big city.
Majority of people has suggested children to grow up in developed city than in the countryside. Because the developed city can provide various benefits toward their future careers, their parents raise their children in the city. Growing up in a rural area provides an easy-going life pattern to children so that children can have more freedom than children in the city. Nevertheless, it will be the best for children to have their youth life in a big city.
Spending time with nature seems learning; however, because of the importance of children's intellectual development children must spend their life in the city. Since there are various specialized education systems in the city, it will help the children for education. The most important institutions are concentrated in a big city because the most people live there. On the other hand, those who dwelling in the countryside often confronts with limited education because they lack the education system. The children who had their youth life in countryside are likely to get a small range of knowledge compare to children in city. For instance, Heidi who was a littler girl in Europe lived in Alps. She had happy life in Alps, but she could not read despite her age. In order all children to be civilized they should live in the city where they can learn.
Not only living in a large city helps children to be educated, but also it helps to have longer preparation time for their future. Specifically, those living in a rural area are often prone to have limited opportunities to see wider range of job opportunities. Since most of cities have concentrated with industrial and financial institutions, most parents desire to move into a city for the best for their children. In this sense, children are able to gain more career opportunities than in the countryside. Furthermore, growing up in a large city makes children to see people with diverse career, ethnicity, and different cultural backgrounds. In this regard, living in a big city offers various job opportunities.
Knowledge is the most basic to build children's future. In order to gain knowledge growing children up in the city will definitely help it because it has more stabilized systems. Since the developed city provides greater specialized systems and various institutions than in countryside, letting children to grow in big city will be more efficient.
Can you guys give me a score out of five (I wrote this in thirty minutes)
It is better for children to grow up in the countryside rather than in a big city.
Majority of people has suggested children to grow up in developed city than in the countryside. Because the developed city can provide various benefits toward their future careers, their parents raise their children in the city. Growing up in a rural area provides an easy-going life pattern to children so that children can have more freedom than children in the city. Nevertheless, it will be the best for children to have their youth life in a big city.
Spending time with nature seems learning; however, because of the importance of children's intellectual development children must spend their life in the city. Since there are various specialized education systems in the city, it will help the children for education. The most important institutions are concentrated in a big city because the most people live there. On the other hand, those who dwelling in the countryside often confronts with limited education because they lack the education system. The children who had their youth life in countryside are likely to get a small range of knowledge compare to children in city. For instance, Heidi who was a littler girl in Europe lived in Alps. She had happy life in Alps, but she could not read despite her age. In order all children to be civilized they should live in the city where they can learn.
Not only living in a large city helps children to be educated, but also it helps to have longer preparation time for their future. Specifically, those living in a rural area are often prone to have limited opportunities to see wider range of job opportunities. Since most of cities have concentrated with industrial and financial institutions, most parents desire to move into a city for the best for their children. In this sense, children are able to gain more career opportunities than in the countryside. Furthermore, growing up in a large city makes children to see people with diverse career, ethnicity, and different cultural backgrounds. In this regard, living in a big city offers various job opportunities.
Knowledge is the most basic to build children's future. In order to gain knowledge growing children up in the city will definitely help it because it has more stabilized systems. Since the developed city provides greater specialized systems and various institutions than in countryside, letting children to grow in big city will be more efficient.
Can you guys give me a score out of five (I wrote this in thirty minutes)