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Posts by brucal9207
Joined: Oct 24, 2010
Last Post: Jan 1, 2011
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  
From: United States of America

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brucal9207   
Oct 24, 2010
Undergraduate / "Business Professionals of America" - Common App Short Response help- BPA [2]

Would this be an appropriate response ?
I would appreciate any help.

Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (150 words or fewer)

I remember thinking to myself at first, "who would want to be in Business Professionals of America It sounds so tedious." How wrong I was! This great club has offered me countless opportunities to put my passion for business and technology into practice. From our small classroom meetings to the competitions at the National Convention in Anaheim, where my love for computers helped me advance to the national level, it has been a constant source of motivation and knowledge. Since becoming the Chair of Fundraising, in charge of our Software-Selling Project, I have also learned a lot about the operation of a small business, from entering orders into our specially created database to customer support.

Being part of Business Professionals of America has provided me with the perfect environment and challenges to prepare me for what lies ahead.
brucal9207   
Jan 1, 2011
Undergraduate / Quilting: Common application short essay on an extracurricular [2]

From prior experience, I have found that quilting is often thought of as a hobby for the elderly and housewives. Contrary to this, I feel that quilting is a forgotten art, taking immense skill and knowledge of geometry.

When my quilting career emerged at the age of sixteen, I began creating child and infant quilts and gave them as gifts. When these quilts were received, - sounds a bit choppy

Maybe something like "My quilting career began when I was sixteen, I created child and infant quilts and gave them as gifts. I was astonished at the joy they brought to people."

I find it simply beautiful how a handmade blanket can flush the darkness out of someone's day and replace it with love, caring, and understanding.

It seems good, but if you can manage to add to it a bit more, i would think it would help.
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