Undergraduate / "I must guide my life for a better future" - UC [4]

This is my final Draft for the UC admission essay. please be critical. Thanks

Since the birth of my academic life, I have been determined to accomplish the absolute best that I possibly could. I cannot explain this passion for success that burns inside me; it has simply been with me as far as I can remember. For the majority of my life, I was an only child being raised by a single mother. My mother gave birth to me at a young age and struggled to house, feed, and fund the basic necessities to my childhood. When I started school, the learning experience was one that clicked instantly. In my later years of school, about middle school, the absence of my father began to impact me. As my curriculum began to become more challenging, I frequently became lost and disillusioned. My mother often worked in the night and often times I did not see her. In my times of hardship, I needed someone I could look up to and share my struggles with; a person who would not only show support, but also encourage me to do my best. As I realized it was my responsibility to increase my efforts towards school, my determination only pushed me to my limits. I knew the only person I could rely upon was myself. I studied constantly and attended tutoring to aid myself to ensure a higher grade in my subjects.

Entering high school was an exciting time for me. I knew this was where I could be surrounded by peers who had similar goals and aspirations. My entrance into high school yielded another introduction into my life though, my neglectful step-father. I recall a certain event where I came home wishing to show him my semester grades, filled with hard-earned "A's". As I presented him my report card, he showed no signs of interest at all. He only further confirmed my belief that my academic life was to be lead by only me. I began to see myself not as a teenager, but as an adult who needed to guide his own future. I began to organize my time and prioritize what needed to be done to ensure my success in my classes. I challenged myself and took numerous advanced placement and honors courses.

Despite a true father-figure in my life, I have learned a lesson which can only be taught through experience. I know that although family and peers are there to support me through hardships, I must guide my life and provide the will power to do so in order to accomplish a better future.