chloebear
Jan 10, 2011
Undergraduate / Modernization of a Hometown - Common App [3]
I am not sure that this is the direction you want to go in. Yes, this answers the prompt but from what you have written I don't see a real sense of emotion or why this person is important to you. The description of the camp, and the kid do not seem to correlate. As a reader, I did not understand why he was there or the connection you made with him.
I am not sure that this is the direction you want to go in. Yes, this answers the prompt but from what you have written I don't see a real sense of emotion or why this person is important to you. The description of the camp, and the kid do not seem to correlate. As a reader, I did not understand why he was there or the connection you made with him.