Meg36
Jan 13, 2011
Undergraduate / Friends + Music expression - UGA Part II Application Essays [2]
Hello, I would love some input on these two essays that I am sending to The University of Georgia for admissions consideration. Any advice is much appreciated. Thank you!
Also, both of my essays are over the maximum word limit (which is 200 words), so it would be wonderful if if anyone has any input on how I could shorten them.
Essay 1: "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
-Anais Nin
From freshman year to now, we know that you have interacted with a number of people in your high school who are different from you and have affected who you are now. Tell us about one such relationship, with a focus on the details of your interaction, not the person.
The first day of junior year was going well; I had friends in all of my classes, all of my teachers seemed wonderful, and my last period of the day was visual arts. As I walked in to that class, every seat was taken except for one; the one beside a girl who was dressed in more colors than I've ever seen on one human being. Half of her hair was shaved off and the other half was pulled in to a ponytail consisting of three thick, long dreadlocks. This girl was eccentric to say the least. I was excited to sit by her, and I had a feeling that it was going to be an interesting class. When I sat down, introduced myself, and asked her what her name was, she replied, "See-da" in a very thick Spanish accent. "I am foreign exchange student from 'Barthelona', Spain" she added with enthusiasm. The name at the top of her paper read Sira Perez. "Wow! That's really neat. How long have you been away from Barcelona?" I asked, intrigued. For the rest of the class our conversation went on; I was continuously fascinated by the way she described Spain and her life there. Throughout the year, Sira grew very close to my friends and me, and she introduced a whole new world of interesting views and ideas to our small group of friends from Woodstock, GA. Being friends with such an exotic and captivating individual has been an incredibly rewarding experience; Sira opened up a new world for me, painting a picture of travel, adventure, and new opportunity. She has truly inspired me to learn more about the world and seek the endless possibilities that it presents.
Essay 4: "Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent."
-Victor Hugo
If someone were to look at your music collection right now, they would probably know a great deal about who you are. Individuals are drawn to music, and each song conveys something about that person. Select a musical piece to be your theme song. Tell us what it would be, and more specifically, why it represents who you are.
Picking a single song to represent myself is difficult. I have over 4,000 songs and live shows in my music library, and I spend any free time I have listening to music and going to see musicians play. Being an avid music lover makes narrowing down this choice very hard, but as I'm listening to it now, the song that I feel perfectly reflects who I am as a person and truly speaks to my soul Living of Love by The Avett Brothers. The folky undertones from Scott Avett's banjo bring to mind an image of the Appalachian Mountains and the beautiful nature that thrives there, an image that is very near and dear to my heart. I feel that the folk aspect of this song embodies my love of nature, mountains, and my aspiration to protect the environment. The rhythmic, energetic kick drum played by Seth Avett brings out my liveliness and hunger for life and adventure. The upbeat, sincere harmonies of the brothers are reminiscent of my personality, a positive, happy person, and down to earth person that enjoys being in the company of others. The lyrics to Living of Love speak directly about my personal views on life; a little love can go a long way. Just like the song says, I believe that every living thing deserves being treated with love and kindness. In a way, nothing could be more perfect to represent who I am than a song. Music is composed of many separate elements, such as a single guitar riff or a piano melody, that create something beautiful and inspiring when they come together in a song. I view myself in a similar way; I am composed of many aspects that come together and create who I am as a person.
Hello, I would love some input on these two essays that I am sending to The University of Georgia for admissions consideration. Any advice is much appreciated. Thank you!
Also, both of my essays are over the maximum word limit (which is 200 words), so it would be wonderful if if anyone has any input on how I could shorten them.
Essay 1: "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
-Anais Nin
From freshman year to now, we know that you have interacted with a number of people in your high school who are different from you and have affected who you are now. Tell us about one such relationship, with a focus on the details of your interaction, not the person.
The first day of junior year was going well; I had friends in all of my classes, all of my teachers seemed wonderful, and my last period of the day was visual arts. As I walked in to that class, every seat was taken except for one; the one beside a girl who was dressed in more colors than I've ever seen on one human being. Half of her hair was shaved off and the other half was pulled in to a ponytail consisting of three thick, long dreadlocks. This girl was eccentric to say the least. I was excited to sit by her, and I had a feeling that it was going to be an interesting class. When I sat down, introduced myself, and asked her what her name was, she replied, "See-da" in a very thick Spanish accent. "I am foreign exchange student from 'Barthelona', Spain" she added with enthusiasm. The name at the top of her paper read Sira Perez. "Wow! That's really neat. How long have you been away from Barcelona?" I asked, intrigued. For the rest of the class our conversation went on; I was continuously fascinated by the way she described Spain and her life there. Throughout the year, Sira grew very close to my friends and me, and she introduced a whole new world of interesting views and ideas to our small group of friends from Woodstock, GA. Being friends with such an exotic and captivating individual has been an incredibly rewarding experience; Sira opened up a new world for me, painting a picture of travel, adventure, and new opportunity. She has truly inspired me to learn more about the world and seek the endless possibilities that it presents.
Essay 4: "Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent."
-Victor Hugo
If someone were to look at your music collection right now, they would probably know a great deal about who you are. Individuals are drawn to music, and each song conveys something about that person. Select a musical piece to be your theme song. Tell us what it would be, and more specifically, why it represents who you are.
Picking a single song to represent myself is difficult. I have over 4,000 songs and live shows in my music library, and I spend any free time I have listening to music and going to see musicians play. Being an avid music lover makes narrowing down this choice very hard, but as I'm listening to it now, the song that I feel perfectly reflects who I am as a person and truly speaks to my soul Living of Love by The Avett Brothers. The folky undertones from Scott Avett's banjo bring to mind an image of the Appalachian Mountains and the beautiful nature that thrives there, an image that is very near and dear to my heart. I feel that the folk aspect of this song embodies my love of nature, mountains, and my aspiration to protect the environment. The rhythmic, energetic kick drum played by Seth Avett brings out my liveliness and hunger for life and adventure. The upbeat, sincere harmonies of the brothers are reminiscent of my personality, a positive, happy person, and down to earth person that enjoys being in the company of others. The lyrics to Living of Love speak directly about my personal views on life; a little love can go a long way. Just like the song says, I believe that every living thing deserves being treated with love and kindness. In a way, nothing could be more perfect to represent who I am than a song. Music is composed of many separate elements, such as a single guitar riff or a piano melody, that create something beautiful and inspiring when they come together in a song. I view myself in a similar way; I am composed of many aspects that come together and create who I am as a person.