vandergraff127
Apr 21, 2011
Undergraduate / Application Essay about how i messed up in high school (my record) [12]
Hi i am applying to Michigan State University and I need some input on the essay i have written. Here is the prompt...
If you feel that your high school record does not accurately represent your academic abilities, please explain why. Include and discuss particular extenuating circumstances that may have contributed to any scholastic challenges.
Here is my essay thus far... I warn you it is a first draft, but what i am wondering is do you think that it is to much of a sob story?
If I had the opportunity to go back in time and redo a past event of my life differently, I would choose the years I went to high school. My performance in school was less than ideal; in this time of my life, I was plagued with an insufferable problem. The dilemma I had to deal with as a teenager was that of an estranged mother battling with bipolar disorder compounded with alcoholism. The burden of her problems carried over into my life and took a dominant position which overshadowed my homework and studies. The result of this was a bad high school record. Since those years, I have realized that I cannot continue to blame my mom for my poor performance in school. I have stepped up and have taken responsibility for myself.
If allowed a second go round, I would apply my understanding of taking responsibility of myself to overcome my hardship and do well in school. I now know that participating in class discussions and doing the homework gives a better understanding of the subject matter and how studying solidifies the understanding. With a second chance, I would participate in class, do my homework on time and study hard to become a better student. Another regret that I have from high school is never joining a club. I missed out on the rewarding experience of being part of my school community and would like to change that. I did have one experience in my high school career where I went on a 4 day trip with my A.P environmental science class. The trip took the class to a forest preserve in Wisconsin, where we learned about forests, bogs and river systems. The trip was enlightening and gratifying. The fondest memory I have of the trip was a big scavenger hunt that sent the students on a hike through the forest looking for plants and fungus's to collect and bring back. The experience I had on this trip opened my eyes to the serenity of nature, and produced a friendship that I still have to this day. I regret that I never got to experience this more than once. At the time I did not realize how being a part of my school community would offer me those kinds of rich experiences.
During those four years of my life, I placed too much of my attention into dealing with the pain that my mom had caused me and not enough attention on school. The repercussions of this cost me a good deal of time trying to get my life on the right track again. I have been able to overcome the onus which I have been struggling with for so long. I now am able to focus all my attention on bettering myself and my situation. I understand that time of my life is gone and cannot be redone and there is no use in dwelling on the past. What I am currently doing is proving that my poor performance in high school is not defining of my intellect or my ambition. The drive I have to be the best I can is fueled by an intense passion to understand the workings of nature.
Hi i am applying to Michigan State University and I need some input on the essay i have written. Here is the prompt...
If you feel that your high school record does not accurately represent your academic abilities, please explain why. Include and discuss particular extenuating circumstances that may have contributed to any scholastic challenges.
Here is my essay thus far... I warn you it is a first draft, but what i am wondering is do you think that it is to much of a sob story?
If I had the opportunity to go back in time and redo a past event of my life differently, I would choose the years I went to high school. My performance in school was less than ideal; in this time of my life, I was plagued with an insufferable problem. The dilemma I had to deal with as a teenager was that of an estranged mother battling with bipolar disorder compounded with alcoholism. The burden of her problems carried over into my life and took a dominant position which overshadowed my homework and studies. The result of this was a bad high school record. Since those years, I have realized that I cannot continue to blame my mom for my poor performance in school. I have stepped up and have taken responsibility for myself.
If allowed a second go round, I would apply my understanding of taking responsibility of myself to overcome my hardship and do well in school. I now know that participating in class discussions and doing the homework gives a better understanding of the subject matter and how studying solidifies the understanding. With a second chance, I would participate in class, do my homework on time and study hard to become a better student. Another regret that I have from high school is never joining a club. I missed out on the rewarding experience of being part of my school community and would like to change that. I did have one experience in my high school career where I went on a 4 day trip with my A.P environmental science class. The trip took the class to a forest preserve in Wisconsin, where we learned about forests, bogs and river systems. The trip was enlightening and gratifying. The fondest memory I have of the trip was a big scavenger hunt that sent the students on a hike through the forest looking for plants and fungus's to collect and bring back. The experience I had on this trip opened my eyes to the serenity of nature, and produced a friendship that I still have to this day. I regret that I never got to experience this more than once. At the time I did not realize how being a part of my school community would offer me those kinds of rich experiences.
During those four years of my life, I placed too much of my attention into dealing with the pain that my mom had caused me and not enough attention on school. The repercussions of this cost me a good deal of time trying to get my life on the right track again. I have been able to overcome the onus which I have been struggling with for so long. I now am able to focus all my attention on bettering myself and my situation. I understand that time of my life is gone and cannot be redone and there is no use in dwelling on the past. What I am currently doing is proving that my poor performance in high school is not defining of my intellect or my ambition. The drive I have to be the best I can is fueled by an intense passion to understand the workings of nature.