Posts by isqun1

isqun1

Sep 20, 2011

Writing Feedback / IELTS-what factors determine one's value to the society? is it wages? [4]

One of the reasons for my belief is that a high pay does not necessarily generate a positive value to the community. For example, people who CARRY OUT illegal BUSINESS SUCH AS drug trafficking or prostitution earns more than an average person, considering the risk taken. But can we ONE say that they are more valuable than ~~most of us?~~ OTHER PEOPLE? I doubt it. Then ~~thatis where the question of~~ what are the guages to measure one's value to the community.? ~~comes in to play,~~ Contribution is a decisive factor. Which could be both tangible and intangible in nature. For instance, donation can be expected as one of the intangible venues of contributing to the society. In this case, people's value would be measured by the mount of money ~~he/she gives~~ given to the charity.

isqun1

Sep 23, 2011

Writing Feedback / Children compitition or co-operation? [2]

Some people think that competition in children should be encouraged others believe that children who are taught to

co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is true that now a days there is competitive environment for the children in the schools.
There is argument that this competitive behaviour is useful for the students.However,
some people believe that instead of compete children should teach to co-operate
with each others.In my opinion co-operative attitude is more useful.

Children can get many benefits if they help each others .First of all , they can
share experiences in this way they will get more information.They can
discuss and solve each others problems.For example in early days
of my school life i could not go school alone.One of my friends used
to go with me and i used to help help him in Mathematics.

Co-operative behaviour develops leadership qualities among the children.
By this boys and girls learn to work as a team.That can be very useful in
their practical life .Psychologists agree on this point that sports like football
in which children play in a team, are very useful for the character and leadership
development.

On the other hand,competitive environment can be useful to encourage students for
more work .But it has some limitations.It can create stressful environment which
will affect students performance.Competitive environment benefits only those
students which are good in study.Week and average students even do not enter
the competition to stand first in the class.

In a nutshell, co-perativeness among the children is not only useful for their
learning but also for their character.Nevertheless, sense of competition
can motivate some students to do work hard but it negative effect should
not ignored

isqun1

Sep 23, 2011

Writing Feedback / Should universities accept the equal men and women? -- Ielts Test [3]

Both male and female have the rights to follow their dreams and sex will not be a barrier if admission department takes their applications into consideration carefully, excluding gender factor.

In my opinion admissions should be on merit .By this i mean there can be more girls in a class
or there can be all boys.

isqun1

Sep 26, 2011

Writing Feedback / Chorleywood village near London - ielts writing task 1 [5]

Furthermore, the third period, from 1922 to 170, saw a continuos enlargement both eastwards and southwards of the village along the rail road. .

1922 to 1970 . Eastwards and Southwards.
There is no concluding paragraph.

isqun1

Sep 26, 2011

Writing Feedback / the water cycle - ielts task 1 [5]

The sun directly causes the evaporation, in which water from the sea, lakes and rivers in the world is warmed by the solar heat.

Water in the sea,lakes and rivers is warmed and evaporated by the solar heat.

Simultaneously, water vapour is also created by the continous transpiration process of living plants

Water vapours are ....

isqun1

Oct 4, 2011

Writing Feedback / ielts : How does position of women influence society? [2]

Indeed,the human rights have changed the roles and responsibilities of women in th ...

awareness about human rights have changed the role and responsibilities of women ....

.Recent riots and looting in Great Britain,for instance,showed the lack of moral values among youngsters

The young people who belong to minorities such as Asians and Africans were mainly involved
in the looting.The British goverments unequal policies was the reason behind this riots.The mothers of those youngesters may not be responsible for that.Many of them might not be working as a prfessional woman.