Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by aljur
Joined: Feb 20, 2007
Last Post: Feb 22, 2007
Threads: 2
Posts: 6  
From: Bulgaria

Displayed posts: 8
sort: Oldest first   Latest first  | 
aljur   
Feb 21, 2007
Essays / Spending a million dollar - an introduction for my essay? [7]

"If I had a million dollars, before spending any of it, I'd get it all in $100 bills, throw the bills on my bed, lie down in the money and cover myself up in it. Only after becoming cozy with it would I be ready to spend my money."

I need more details..my teacher told me to put more I need 7 sentences then i will start to write my body paragraph.
aljur   
Feb 21, 2007
Essays / Spending a million dollar - an introduction for my essay? [7]

"If I had a million dollars to spend, I would start by making a list with two columns. The first column would be marked "Needs" and the second, "Wants." I would prioritize my needs and wants and see how far the money would stretch."
aljur   
Feb 21, 2007
Essays / Spending a million dollar - an introduction for my essay? [7]

Is this Introduction make sense?

what would you do if you had a million dollars? Most of us wants to be wise when it comes to money. While others spend their money on things that are not so important. If i had a million dollars, I would definitely use the money properly. ( this is my introduction ) please help me to edit...
aljur   
Feb 22, 2007
Writing Feedback / Money is one of the greatest tools in life [5]

Money is one of the greatest tools in life. We can buy convinience, freedom, and comfortabla life. However, If I had a million dollars, I would prioritize my personal needs and interest. I would also share and help the needs. If ever I had a million, I would definitely use the money properly.

Help me to edit my Introduction Please.. Anyone..

This is my body paragraph:

First and foremost, If I had a million, I would help my parents. I would pay their credit cards, and pay off our house and car. Secondly, I will put my sister back in school; She wants to be an archetic someday but because of lack of money she decided to work. She actually working two jobs. She's working at the store as a sales clerk and the other one is a Data Entry at Pharmacutical. I feel bad because she's paying half of my tuition. I think it's about time to pay back what she've done to me. Since my dad has been wanting to have a brand new car, I would buy him a red BMW. I want to give the best for my family.

If I had a milllion dollars, I would help my grandparents in my country. I would build a small business for them. Maybe a mini groceries store. In that case, I can also help my cousins that didn't work. They graduated from a good college school, but they couldn't find any because of the economy. When we were back in the Philippines, they were giving us some money and foods when we don't have.

You think this is good enough?
aljur   
Feb 22, 2007
Writing Feedback / Money is one of the greatest tools in life [5]

Yes I do, but I coudn't think I'm not good at writing essay I've been here for 1 year and half. I have no idea what I am going to write. Thank you so much for the help. I appreciate it so much. Thank you thank you.
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳