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Posts by ayim5774
Joined: Oct 29, 2011
Last Post: Oct 31, 2011
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
From: United States of America

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ayim5774   
Oct 29, 2011
Undergraduate / 'ABCs And 123s' - Common App Personal Statement [10]

I chose to write on a topic of my choice. I'd appreciate any help. Thanks.

Here it is:

ABCs And 123s

Can you really quantify quality? What is the logic behind logic? Who said an answer had to be the end of a question? Why can't I use the numbers in my problem set to form a picture of Ronald McDonald on a dragon?

Early on in my childhood, my father, an actuary, introduced me to the stubborn, unflinching opponent that is mathematics. "But why doesn't two plus two equal window?" I asked, foolishly trying to support an equation I'd seen in a cartoon. My father answered with a lengthy explanation about how math dealt with numbers, formulas, and variables rather than childish attempts to arrange four 1's into the shape of a window. "Oh," I responded with a blank look on my face.

It seemed like for every curious, hypothetical or even slightly unconventional thought I could form, there existed a logical or factual rebuttal to throw it into submission. It wasn't math that had me frustrated; it was the facts, the formulas, the "universally accepted truths", and even the rankings that I often refer to. It was the idea that there was a be-all and an end-all to everything. Every city had a quality of life rating, every baseball player had a stat sheet, and every student had a GPA and an SAT score and that was that. I couldn't understand how a combination of a few numbers was enough to explain something that deserved thousands upon thousands of words to even begin to comprehend.

Could it be that numbers carry more weight than words? Not for me. Numbers have often served to inform me but they have never brought me to tears or compelled me to laugh the way that words have. When I feel constrained by the limitations of facts and formulas, I have words to loose me of my binds. I have stories to take me on countless journeys to places once unaccessible, to whisk me away on all of their improbable adventures. For every situation my mind creates, I have words to breathe life into it. The clicking of my fingertips on lettered keys and the eager flipping of yellowing pages have shown me books and poems that paint pictures worth every one of their thousand words.

But really, aren't those poems and stories just a collection of words? And what are those words other than combinations of letters? What difference is there between a word and a collection of numbers? Numbers are often used to answer or to find answers whereas words form question and explanations. But maybe those numbers aren't answers as much as they are a basis for more explaining and more questioning. Maybe the picture we are meant to see is as much a complex numerical code as it is a collection of poetry and stories. And in the end, maybe it all adds up to make a window, inviting you to look through it and see the world like you've never seen it before.
ayim5774   
Oct 30, 2011
Undergraduate / 'ABCs And 123s' - Common App Personal Statement [10]

Gosh... Thank you so much. I was really hoping my essay wouldn't just get destroyed. I agree with what you said about the detail and the rhetorical questions. I have a tendency to write with lots of questions that never get answered but I guess that's easy to see from my essay. Thanks for the help. I'd love to look at your essay.
ayim5774   
Oct 30, 2011
Undergraduate / 'The land of golden opportunities' - Common App: Journey of a Lifetime [14]

Hello! I really enjoyed this essay. My parents actually immigrated to the US when they were in their early teens so this is very relatable to me. Actually, English is my second language as well so I commend you on your excellent writing; it's pretty tough for a lot of native English speakers to write as well as you do. Big picture-wise, I thought it was great! There are a few grammar things but who doesn't have those? By the way, the last line in the first paragraph, the one about the airplane, was one of the best lines I've read in a really long time.
ayim5774   
Oct 31, 2011
Undergraduate / 'ABCs And 123s' - Common App Personal Statement [10]

Thank you cvben, I just finished working on my personal statement with my english teacher to get the final touches done and to sort out some possibly confusing parts. I do go to the University Laboratory School but the one I go to is in Honolulu not Chicago although I am applying to UChicago EA so I've got my fingers crossed and my warmest clothing ready to go if I'm lucky enough.
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