Undergraduate / USC Essay- ("Newton's First Law of Motion") [6]

Newton's First Law of Motion states that an object in motion tends to stay in motion in the same direction unless acted upon by an external force. Tell us about an external influence (a person, an event, etc.) that affected you and how it caused you to change direction.

Did my essay follow topic/flow? was there any grammar errors? if there are and such please inform me?

At one moment in my life, all I could hear were the pounding voices of my cousins, screaming the same words: You are a Chinese failure.

Being constantly pressured by my cousins, I grew up strictly following the imposed standards that modeled the "ideal" Chinese child: a top ranked student, a fluent Taiwanese and Chinese speaker, and an embodiment of Taiwanese culture and heritage. My parents, however rarely impose standards on me, rather they gave me freedom to follow my own dreams, but still required me to embrace and understand my traditional Taiwanese roots. Growing up with contradictory views, I often felt limited in cultured views, for I felt as though I had walked in a thousand footprints but none my own. I desperately struggled to create an identity for myself that would allow me to mirror all the ideals and expectations my family had for me, unfortunately I could not. Soon I fell hopelessly depressed for I had fallen, trapped in the no man's land. For the first time in ages, andrenaline rapidly rushed as my body repetively shivered; the cold sweat slowly fell as my heart rapidly beated . My mind blanked in fear, then suddenly I ran- ran away from home for the first and last time.

Without looking back in "common sense" or direction, I kept running, pass the homogeneous streets, through the same typical houses normally entrapped me to a one cultured society. Enervated, and drained, I finally allowed myself to stop- at a dimly litted park. As the night begin to seep in the park, I sat on a bench, staring at the skies, feeling as though I was a nobody with no view. Soon I heard footsteps tap, and then a stranger, Mr. Sanjojo came up to me and asked me if I had a home. When he mentioned the word "home" I shuddered, and suddenly began to cry. Out of pity, he took me to his apartment.

Once I entered I stopped crying and stared. The apartment was so multicultural that at that time I thought I had entered a magical palace. On one side of a wall there were flags of 30 nations and on other walls there were artifacts such as pottery, instruments, and toys, that he had gathered from his travels around the world. Mr. Sanjojo told stories about the pottery and toys. While hearing the stories about the pottery of the Aztec, Japan, and South Africa, I smiled a genuine smile, and attentively listened. That night, after spending the night dancing to traditional Indonesian dances, and singing Latin hymns, I came to experience different cultures, and I came to experience a change, a change within myself. I came to realize that the reason why I was able to embrace and love the different cultures was because I had spent my time trying to accept the subcultures within my own culture while finding myself. Although this was the first time I had experienced the different diversities that surrounded me, I came to realize that I was not completely trapped, for I could retain my own cultural identity while not only embracing other Asian cultures but also the cultures of the world. I had an opportunity to start anew.

Now I look forward to taking an opportunity to experience all that life has to offer and fully understand the similarities and differences of the cultural world. I maybe "cliché" but I've come to realize that experiencing and understanding the diversity around me has shaped me into a worldly and empathetic individual. When I start college next year, nothing and everything will be new. I will continue to embrace different cultures and different views as I have for many years while continuously changing to create a culture of my own.