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Posts by sjm979
Joined: Jan 17, 2012
Last Post: Feb 16, 2012
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 4
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sjm979   
Jan 17, 2012
Writing Feedback / whether or not students should wear uniforms to school :) [3]

Hi!! This is my first time using essay forum, and i hope I'm doing it right... haha we have to write 5 paragraph persuasive essays for our English class, and this is what i have so far :) here goes nothing... :)

Uniforms: Too Cool for School?



I have worn a uniform to school for as long as I can remember. I had always thought that uniforms were an easy, comfortable, and respectable way to dress for school, and now that I attend a high school where uniforms are mandatory, I like them even more. Uniforms allow you to look professional, clean and well mannered. They also make getting dressed in the morning super simple, mainly because everything already matches! Uniforms provide a sense of security and stability to the kids who wear them. I really enjoy wearing a uniform because I know nobody can judge me by what I wear. By wearing a uniform, people to have to get to know me based on my personality and not my wardrobe. Even though many people think that wearing a uniform limits a student's right to express themselves, I think that schools should enforce them because they don't promote cliques based on your clothes, they allow students to focus on their studies and not what they put on in the morning, and it has been proven that students that wear uniforms score higher on tests than those who go to school dressed in the latest fashion trends.

Through experience at my elementary school, I think it's safe to say that preteen girls are very critical when it comes to judging other kids' clothing choices. When we would have dress down days, where we didn't have to wear the uniform, nine times out of ten drama was caused over who said what about somebody else's clothes. People would judge you by what brand of jeans you were wearing or whether or not your sweater had a little monogrammed moose on it. The girls in my class would exclude you from their "group" if you were wearing something that they deemed "uncool." I began to notice that people turned into total snobs when we weren't wearing our uniforms, but would go back to normal once we all looked the same the next day. All of this drama could've been stopped by not having dress down days, and always having the uniform on. This is because uniforms are equalizers, and they don't allow for cliques and groups to be started based on clothing.

I noticed that during those dress down days when we were out of the uniform, kids had a lot of trouble focusing on what we were being taught. I think this is because everyone was so caught up in whether or not the popular girls would like their outfits, or what people were saying about them that they forgot that school isn't a fashion show. School is a place to learn and prepare yourself for college later in life, but I think it's hard for kids to focus on that goal when there are so many pressures and distractions to worry about, like clothing choices. That's why uniforms are so convenient because when you take some of those distractions and worries away, kids are able to focus on what's really important; their education.

Studies have been done that prove students who wear uniforms score higher on standardized tests than those who wear whatever they want to school. This is because fashion in a teens mind is a huge distraction, not to mention all the worries and stress that come with it, and when you take all that way and make everyone look the same, students aren't as concerned with what they look like compared to other people. When everyone is wearing the same thing, nobody can make fun of you without dissing themselves in the process. Because kids who wear uniforms don't have to worry about what people are saying about their outfit, they can focus more on their studies and schoolwork.

As you can see, there are many reasons that students should wear uniforms to school. Many people think that uniforms limit self-expression through clothing choices, but they forgot that school isn't a fashion show. Uniforms don't promote cliques based on your clothes, they allow students to focus on their studies and not what they put on in the morning, and it has been proven that students that wear uniforms score higher on tests than those who go to school dressed in the latest fashion trends. I think that because of these reasons, students should wear uniforms in school.
sjm979   
Feb 16, 2012
Writing Feedback / whether or not students should wear uniforms to school :) [3]

Thanks so much! I didn't actually think people would reply to this, but you did!! Haha your FARTERS method is pretty neat :) I have never heard that before, but it is pretty helpful! Anyways, I had already handed this essay in (I got a 98% on it!!!) and then I totally forgot that I posted it on here... But I will definetly be using the site again for future essays!!! I will be sure to check yours out :) thanks again :)
sjm979   
Feb 16, 2012
Essays / How to start an essa about someone special? [7]

Ummm, well, what kind of essay does it have to be?? Descriptive? It sounds like that would be it because of all the adjectives you listed :) Do you have a word limit or anything?? If I knew some of these things I would be glad to help :)
sjm979   
Feb 16, 2012
Writing Feedback / Essay about - Are SAT/ACT good indicators of ones academic abilities? [4]

Hi! I thought your essay had a good base, but you could work on your structure and format a little more. Also, maybe you could run it through a spell checker :) did you have a word limit or anything because it seemed kinda short to me. You have a lot of good points, maybe try reorganizing them into a three or five paragraph essay??? I think if you make these changes (which are pretty easy to do, don't worry(:) your essay could be a lot stronger :)
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