Undergraduate / 'The world of nursing' - one paragraph from my essay [5]

I'm not sure to whom this is addressed to, but I would try to avoid 2nd person.

[Why did you choose to become a nurse? For security.] - The main reason I became a nurse:security

[Yes it is one of the reason] - redundant

[Having a heart for people who need and will be needing our hand] - Caring for people who are in need and willing to aid

[and by that we can still have a better world as what we want it to be.] - Separate into two sentences and try to be more clear. What is a better world?

I only edited major errors