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Posts by roza
Joined: Jan 11, 2009
Last Post: Jan 27, 2009
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
From: United Arab Emirates

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roza   
Jan 11, 2009
Essays / a comparative essay between any two things [12]

Hi

First at all, I cant speak English very well and am so bad on writing and verb tenses
and my teacher is American and she is very strictness about every thing on writing subject verb agreement,fragment,run on,verb tenses,cap,pun,thesis statement,general statement and topic concluding sentences etc. Therefore, I expect help from yo ladies & gentleman because I think that you are professional in writing

Mrs. Karen asked me to write a comparative essay between any two things
this is my check list:
** an interesting title
** Indent
**Use an attention getting opning for my introduction
**Thesis statement
**Body(one paragraph for comparing,one paragraph for contrasting) using transitions
**Details that unite with topic sentence
**Concluding paragraph with comment - use a transitions
**Have four paragraphs
**Use for example/for instance
**Use simple sentence with ssv (subject*verb*verb)
**Use at least one compound sentence using and
**Use at least one complex_ you choose

**Use a semi_colon
**Use at least one complex sentence using while or whereas with a comma
**Use consistent pronouns\verbs
**Check for coherence-smoothness of paragraphs with transitions
I want to make comparison between my best friend and me
we have a lot of similarities and differences
such as we like the same blue color and we have long black hair and the same skin color and honey-colored eyes and we like swimming and like romantic movies and both of us are in the same college and the same major etc.

can you help start with an attintion getting wich must be related with the general and thesis statement
it's better if the attention getter was about friendship
my thesis is: as a best friends, Nora and I have a lot of similarities and differences.
what are you think about it??
or should I write the essay and then you will fix it??
I am waiting for answer
thank you very much
my respect to all of you :)
roza
roza   
Jan 26, 2009
Essays / a comparative essay between any two things [12]

OK sorry i am late but i gave the essay to my teacher and it was the first time i took A in but she asks me to write it over, so i hope that you help me editing :):

My Best Friend and I

" My best friend is my mirror," I always say. My best friend, Nora, is my twin and soul mate. People around us always say that we often act like each other. As best friends, Nora and I have a lot of similarities and differences.

Nora and I have many similarities. For example, we both have long black hair, brown eyes, and the same skin color. Also, Ahmad is the name of both our brothers. I like Italian food. Nora does, too. Nora and I are equally social, and we like yo have a lot of interaction with people. Moreover, sometimes we buy the same clothes. Nora likes blue just like me. Furthermore, I like romantic movies just like Nora. I study at Dar Al-Hekma College just as Nora. We both have Apple Mac lap tops.

Although we have many similarities, Nora and I have some differences. For instance, Nora is a very sensitive person, and she easily gets upset. In contrast, I hardly get upset. My sign is Scorpio, while Nora's sign is Pisces.Nora is in Level Two in the CPP, but I am in Level Three. Whereas Nora is funny person and has the sense of humor, I am more quiet than her. Unlike me, Nora is lazy and likes to sleep a lot. Nora can take a lot of physical exercises, but I can't. I love tanning very much;on the other hand, Nora doesn't like tanning.

In brief, my best friend and I have a lot uncommon,yet we are different.During our friendship, I have learned that best friends must know their similarities and differences, so they can deal with each other.

and I have a paragraph also i want you to help me in>>>it is a descriptive paragraph about place: can you correct it for me please?

Sweet Room

"Room sweet room," Nora says. My best friend's room is a very ornate modern room. As I walk into her room, the warmth of the green and pink walls entrap into a web of love. In the left corner, the wonderful huge bed seems well organized, for its quilt shape. On the bed, the silky quilt covers and sweetens the bed. On the top of the bed, the soft pillows are full of colors; the pillows are stitched "sweet dreams." In front of the bed, there is a funky multicolored rug. In the frontal wall of the bed, the light is streaming and shining in from the squarish glass window. In the right wall, the window is covered by a silky curtain which allows the sunshine to enter the room, for there is no black out with the curtain.

Another interesting thing about her room is her memories which are painted in the gold frame pictures that cover the right pinkish wall. In the right corner, there is a white and pink wooden bookshelf which contain a lot of my best friend's books. On the top of the bookshelf, there is an amazing crystal lamp which makes the room bright. Beside the bookshelf, there is a small wooden shelf which has a variegated vanilla candle; I adore it.

In short, I hope that you see the room. Although her bed-room is a simple modern room, it makes you feel comfortable as if you are tasting a piece of heaven.

Thats it
thank you beforehand :)
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