Undergraduate / Security condition; Common App: Discuss a local issue and your importance to you. [6]

You have a solid start to your essay. It needs a little bit of editing, but that is to be expected as you are still in the drafting stages of writing it. Let me help you out a little bit with a line-by-line critique of your paragraphs (they posted as one large paragraph so I'll make the paragraph break where I think it should be).

Tropics are great. You're missing the article "The" or perhaps even the phrase "Living in the" before your sentence. However, since you're about to contradict your description of the Tropics being a great place, I would rephrase the first sentence so you don't appear undecided on the issue. Something like "If you look at a tourist guide, living in the Tropics is great" or "To the casual observer, living in the Tropics is great." Plenty of oil to give away, warm weather all year long, white sand beaches and gentle people, snowing peaks and giant falls. Insert the word "There is" at the beginning of your sentence for a smoother transition. It seems like weyou have found Paradise. But sadly, as you start knowing Caracas, the capital of Venezuela and my hometown, you realize things are not like they sound in this so-called Eden. In fact, as you plunge into its valley, choking noises and anguishing images pop up, and what used to be an undisturbed oasis has turnedturns into an infernal scene. Amongst all this, an issue that would not be much of a problem elsewhere, but that symbolizes the curse of every citizen of Caracas , and my own little nightmare, is insecurity.

Many statistics show how unsafe the city and the entire country are, but numbers are meaninglessThis sentence begins well, but the second part contradicts the first part and does not work well as a topic sentence for the rest of the paragraph. The rest of the paragraph describes concrete examples of crime taking place around you, so craft a sentence that will make those examples support it. Consider using "Many statistics indicate how unsafe the country of Venezuela is, particularly its capital city, and personal experience has validated these findings." . It is true that newspapers and broadcasts show you every day how awful the situation is. But death in pictures and letters does not strike half as hard as the behavior of people around me. The feeling of paranoia we have (because it is a feeling shared by all the common people) determines our lives. Without a doubt, this feeling is justified; I have witnessed many robberies, and I have even been robbed once, because it is something you cannot avoid while being in Caracas. For this, I practically live in curfew; people who goesgo out after 9 o'clock in the night are very aware of the risk they are facing. Not even prevention can help, because even the regular pedestrian you fretirritate can randomly kill you; he just happened to carry a gun. I just try to deal with it by wearing bad clothes when I walk in the street, by not looking at people's eyes, because looking barely (Do you mean "very wealthy"?) wealthy can get you spotted and most certainly robbed or kidnapped.

There are a few more errors that are much smaller, and frankly, more nitpicking. I wanted to leave a few of your word choices and sentence structures as they give your writing a non-native speaker of English flavor that is not necessarily grammatically incorrect.

Good luck!

Undergraduate / My aunt would help choose the course for me; NYU/ Academic interests? [7]

I have to agree with brazilian01 in saying you didn't actually answer the question. You certainly have a good start and I particularly like the part about having a solid support network readily available to you in the form of your immediate and extended family. That gives you an advantage over other students who will have to do without the support of readily accessible loved ones during a stressful and demanding time in their lives. That detail tells me that offering you a seat at my school as opposed to giving it to another student, is a more secure risk for me to take; you have a higher chance of graduating on time and doing well in classes.

Do make sure you go back and answer the main question, though: where are your academic interests and how will you explore them at NYU? I certainly didn't know what I wanted to do as a freshman in college, but the question takes that into account and gives you a little bit of leeway. Write about what topics interest you. Go through the course catalog and look at class listings under each of the different colleges. I know that many of the Archaeology, Anthropology, and even Philosophy classes can have really engaging descriptions that make you want to take that course. Unless you know exactly what you want to do career-wise, discuss what piques your interest. Do you have any vague ideas about what you'd like to accomplish during and after college? Maybe start your own business some day? There are many classes that NYU offers that will be vital to helping you achieve that goal if that's one of your dreams (think accounting, business, and even psychology classes). These are just a couple of ideas. Have some fun with it and let your imagination take you away to 5 years down the road.