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Posts by IricBear
Joined: Jan 14, 2013
Last Post: Jan 18, 2013
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  
From: China

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IricBear   
Jan 17, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS writings - Reasons for Obesity and solutions to it [10]

I am really appreciate it if you can read this essay and give me some suggestions
Thanks

the disturbing condition



Obesity has been disturbing a considerable amount of people for a long time, and it is becoming an emergency to keep people in good health.

The heavy work stress and nervous feelings in some degree causes this condition, it is evidently proved by the medical research that those people who are under big pressure are much easier to get heavier. Another reason leads to the increased population of the overweight is on the ground that people are lack of interest of exercising their body, they are unwilling to go outside for some outdoor activities, moreover, many people tend to take "time" as excuse, however, the truth is that they are too lazy to do some sports. Last but not least, fast food and high calorie food also contributes to the phenomenon.

To get rid of the troubles brought by the obesity, people need to make some changes with their lifestyle. Most importantly, it is quite essential to learn to relax, people are supposed to work or study with a peaceful feeling in their mind so that the probability of adding up weight is relatively smaller and the progress can be more likely to be achieved. What's more, if it is possible to spend time playing some sports everyday, the terrible condition will be ameliorated a lot. Try not to have too much fast food which contains little nutrition but high fat.

It is not only for pretty looking but also for people's own health and quality of life, people will find job satisfaction and self-confidence once they have a good figure, and key of deceasing weight is simple, that is to be optimistic and have a positive attitude towards everything in life
IricBear   
Jan 17, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS writings - Reasons for Obesity and solutions to it [10]

Dear dumi
Thank you for correctionïźŒsuggestion and right examplesïźïźthere do have some problems with my grammar =ĺ£=
but actually i was using "disturbing" not distributeïźŒi mean obesity is bothering people. Of courseïźŒmaybe this word is misusedïźŒi hope you can help me!!

THANKS AGAIN : )
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