Bisasa
Oct 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / compare-contrast b/w mother and father;Really need some help;20% part of grade [3]
Do Mothers Make Greater Parents than Fathers?
Men have two choices in life: they can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish they were dead although being happily married doesn't mean they should share several similarities. Meanwhile, many responsibilities take part when they now have the roles of being the mother and the father. It begins from their children's basic needs, the chores and to their duties on their jobs. Who succeeds better at doing their obligations? Because of paid work, mothers and fathers are similar to each other, but child care and housework makes them different from each other, making mothers- stand out.
In order to provide for the family, one must work to get money, but fifty years ago, most mothers were not the ones who were handling the outside job. They were "homemakers" as some would say or "lady of the house." But according to the United States Bureau of Labor Statistics, as of 2010, 64.4 percent of mothers with children under 18 work for a salary (Langer). Mothers are consuming extra time outside the house, who are doing their duties at work. This is because they feel the importance of being employed and its good influence on their productivity with their jobs and the satisfactions to their homes, which is feeling the need to be useful and putting something on the table and taking care of the family. Working is a good thing, either working full-time or half-time as long as a Mother is employed, but does it affect her children? The traditional parent who takes care and who is always with the children is the Mother. According to an article on Livestrong entitled "Responsibilities of Motherhood" by Carolyn Williams, Mothers make sure their children is well nurtured, fed, clothed, and loved and that individual needs are provided while managing the mischievousness of the child. They remember special days, guide their children and help them become responsible and well-mannered, since mothers are their first teachers. Indeed, they give their children lots of love and many times, they sacrifice their time, sleep and enjoyment to make sure their children are alright, even when it means doing the household chores later. Keeping the house clean is one of the Mothers' responsibilities although chores are frequently divided among the family members, but Mothers take the most part of it. There is an area of household chores where Mothers do the cleaning, cooking, laundry, food shopping, even the taxes and budgeting while another is the area of chores outside the house which includes cleaning the garage and the yard and checking for house maintenance, and many other errands (Walker). Doing chores is rarely something that a person enjoys, but do Mothers really do all those things? They should have Wonder Woman's name, then.
Nowadays, Mothers have their jobs in the same way Fathers have them, but even years ago, everybody knows that Fathers' number one responsibility is to provide for their family by working or as Marie Walker states in her article, "Fathering in America: What's a Dad Supposed to Do?", doing their "financial share" with an honest job. And having that responsibility means that the paychecks they earn are now not for themselves only but also for their family's needs. Naturally, there is a good thing when Fathers work because they also show their children the sense of working and living an orderly life (Walker). Disciplining children is a vital duty of Fathers. In the same manner, they do the manly stuff like making their kids understand the toughness of life. In spite of the strictness of Fathers, sometimes, they seem to don't care about what their children do or ask. For example, if their kid is holding a shovel to play with, Mothers would take it dangerously inappropriate for it is not for playing, but for Fathers, they would let him continue and think that their kid is just playing treasure hunt. Another is when asking for money. Fathers are the ones who are always approached by their children because they only ask two words- "How much?" while Mothers would ask Why, What, Where and Who questions before they can get some money. This proves that Mothers are not overprotective or cheap, they just want to know that everything is going to be fine because they care. Speaking of care, most Fathers care a little when it comes to household chores. They still do some but only a little like barbequing, mowing the lawn and killing bugs. And besides, Fathers are tired after working all day and are not present in the house during daytime. Some even think that chores are for a woman's job. If that is so, another point for the Mothers team!
In conclusion, mothers and fathers bring a unique way of parenting and their responsibilities. Mothers are the nurturers because they tend to use their emotional side when with their children, and they do so many things but makes sure to still have time for their family. On the other hand, Fathers mostly do only the working part although they still help with the children and some chores. Meanwhile, there was a viral picture about two graphic organizers on Moms and Dads. There were many words surrounding the word "Mom" like, "I'm hungry," "Where is my shirt?" "Can I..?" "Is dinner ready yet?" "I'm cold," "I can't find my.." On the contrary, the only question that was connected to the word "Dad" was, "Where's Mom?"
Works Cited
Langer, Gary. "Working Moms: The Data and the Politics." ABC News. ABC News Internet Ventures. 12 Apr 2012. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
Walker, Marie. "Chore War: Household Tasks and the Two-Paycheck Couple." Psych Central. Psych Central. n.d. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
---. "Fathering in America: What's a Dad Supposed to Do?" Psych Central. Psych Central. n.d. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
Williams, Carolyn. "Responsibilities of Motherhood." Livestrong. Demand Media, Inc. 23 Mar 2010. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
OUTLINE
Thesis Statement: Because of their paid work, Mothers and Fathers are similar from each other, but child care and housework makes them different from each other, making mothers stand out.
I. Introduction
A. Attention grabber- anecdote
B. Preview of points
C. Thesis Statement
II. Body
A. Mother
1. Work
-Being a Mother and Working Before
-details
- Being a Mother and Working Today
-details (expectations attitude)
2. Children/Child care
-details (full support and love; emotional)
3. Chores
-inside and outside chores
-not an easy task but does it anyway and still makes time for family
B. Father
1. Work
-"financial obligations"
-income not for themselves only
2. Children/ Child Care
- disciplines them and teaches the toughness of life
- Sometimes doesn't care too much
3. Chores
-doesn't help much
-tired after working all day and is not in the house during daytime
II. Conclusion
Sum up everything
------------------------
please tell me your comments. this is my topic on the compare-contrast essay. it's 20% of our final grade.
Here are my questions:
what should I change/ improve?
Does it have an academic tone?
Please help me with an engaging,unique, relevant title.
Does the first paragraph provide an overview of the chosen debate?
Are all quotes and paraphrases properly documented?
Is the work cited properly documented?
Is it free from spelling and grammatical errors?
THANK YOU!
Do Mothers Make Greater Parents than Fathers?
Men have two choices in life: they can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish they were dead although being happily married doesn't mean they should share several similarities. Meanwhile, many responsibilities take part when they now have the roles of being the mother and the father. It begins from their children's basic needs, the chores and to their duties on their jobs. Who succeeds better at doing their obligations? Because of paid work, mothers and fathers are similar to each other, but child care and housework makes them different from each other, making mothers- stand out.
In order to provide for the family, one must work to get money, but fifty years ago, most mothers were not the ones who were handling the outside job. They were "homemakers" as some would say or "lady of the house." But according to the United States Bureau of Labor Statistics, as of 2010, 64.4 percent of mothers with children under 18 work for a salary (Langer). Mothers are consuming extra time outside the house, who are doing their duties at work. This is because they feel the importance of being employed and its good influence on their productivity with their jobs and the satisfactions to their homes, which is feeling the need to be useful and putting something on the table and taking care of the family. Working is a good thing, either working full-time or half-time as long as a Mother is employed, but does it affect her children? The traditional parent who takes care and who is always with the children is the Mother. According to an article on Livestrong entitled "Responsibilities of Motherhood" by Carolyn Williams, Mothers make sure their children is well nurtured, fed, clothed, and loved and that individual needs are provided while managing the mischievousness of the child. They remember special days, guide their children and help them become responsible and well-mannered, since mothers are their first teachers. Indeed, they give their children lots of love and many times, they sacrifice their time, sleep and enjoyment to make sure their children are alright, even when it means doing the household chores later. Keeping the house clean is one of the Mothers' responsibilities although chores are frequently divided among the family members, but Mothers take the most part of it. There is an area of household chores where Mothers do the cleaning, cooking, laundry, food shopping, even the taxes and budgeting while another is the area of chores outside the house which includes cleaning the garage and the yard and checking for house maintenance, and many other errands (Walker). Doing chores is rarely something that a person enjoys, but do Mothers really do all those things? They should have Wonder Woman's name, then.
Nowadays, Mothers have their jobs in the same way Fathers have them, but even years ago, everybody knows that Fathers' number one responsibility is to provide for their family by working or as Marie Walker states in her article, "Fathering in America: What's a Dad Supposed to Do?", doing their "financial share" with an honest job. And having that responsibility means that the paychecks they earn are now not for themselves only but also for their family's needs. Naturally, there is a good thing when Fathers work because they also show their children the sense of working and living an orderly life (Walker). Disciplining children is a vital duty of Fathers. In the same manner, they do the manly stuff like making their kids understand the toughness of life. In spite of the strictness of Fathers, sometimes, they seem to don't care about what their children do or ask. For example, if their kid is holding a shovel to play with, Mothers would take it dangerously inappropriate for it is not for playing, but for Fathers, they would let him continue and think that their kid is just playing treasure hunt. Another is when asking for money. Fathers are the ones who are always approached by their children because they only ask two words- "How much?" while Mothers would ask Why, What, Where and Who questions before they can get some money. This proves that Mothers are not overprotective or cheap, they just want to know that everything is going to be fine because they care. Speaking of care, most Fathers care a little when it comes to household chores. They still do some but only a little like barbequing, mowing the lawn and killing bugs. And besides, Fathers are tired after working all day and are not present in the house during daytime. Some even think that chores are for a woman's job. If that is so, another point for the Mothers team!
In conclusion, mothers and fathers bring a unique way of parenting and their responsibilities. Mothers are the nurturers because they tend to use their emotional side when with their children, and they do so many things but makes sure to still have time for their family. On the other hand, Fathers mostly do only the working part although they still help with the children and some chores. Meanwhile, there was a viral picture about two graphic organizers on Moms and Dads. There were many words surrounding the word "Mom" like, "I'm hungry," "Where is my shirt?" "Can I..?" "Is dinner ready yet?" "I'm cold," "I can't find my.." On the contrary, the only question that was connected to the word "Dad" was, "Where's Mom?"
Works Cited
Langer, Gary. "Working Moms: The Data and the Politics." ABC News. ABC News Internet Ventures. 12 Apr 2012. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
Walker, Marie. "Chore War: Household Tasks and the Two-Paycheck Couple." Psych Central. Psych Central. n.d. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
---. "Fathering in America: What's a Dad Supposed to Do?" Psych Central. Psych Central. n.d. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
Williams, Carolyn. "Responsibilities of Motherhood." Livestrong. Demand Media, Inc. 23 Mar 2010. Web. 9 Oct 2013.
OUTLINE
Thesis Statement: Because of their paid work, Mothers and Fathers are similar from each other, but child care and housework makes them different from each other, making mothers stand out.
I. Introduction
A. Attention grabber- anecdote
B. Preview of points
C. Thesis Statement
II. Body
A. Mother
1. Work
-Being a Mother and Working Before
-details
- Being a Mother and Working Today
-details (expectations attitude)
2. Children/Child care
-details (full support and love; emotional)
3. Chores
-inside and outside chores
-not an easy task but does it anyway and still makes time for family
B. Father
1. Work
-"financial obligations"
-income not for themselves only
2. Children/ Child Care
- disciplines them and teaches the toughness of life
- Sometimes doesn't care too much
3. Chores
-doesn't help much
-tired after working all day and is not in the house during daytime
II. Conclusion
Sum up everything
------------------------
please tell me your comments. this is my topic on the compare-contrast essay. it's 20% of our final grade.
Here are my questions:
what should I change/ improve?
Does it have an academic tone?
Please help me with an engaging,unique, relevant title.
Does the first paragraph provide an overview of the chosen debate?
Are all quotes and paraphrases properly documented?
Is the work cited properly documented?
Is it free from spelling and grammatical errors?
THANK YOU!