Undergraduate / "Eat Veggies, Not Friends" - Vegan Roommate - Stanford Essay (Supplement) [4]

I enjoyed reading your essay. If I woke you up at 4 AM, and asked you to tell me one thing about yourself, and you said you were a vegan, then this essay is totally what you should go with. A 250 word limit means one can't write an autobiography. Instead, it's best to dig into one or two things, and lightly touch on others. That is exactly what you've done.

One minor thing. You may want to consider rewriting this sentence - "If for some reason you have an eternal hatred for vegans, never fear." Any way you could turn this into a positive-sounding sentence?

"I will be happy to share my dark chocolate with you if you will share your opinions and passions with me." <-- Very strong close, great job.

Undergraduate / I believe in laughter. Stanford Supplement Essay [6]

What an amazing essay! A few minor things ..

As melramadhani indicated, the flow does break a tad when you transition to this line - "Laughter is the ultimate example of living in the moment. ..." I think you're trying to indicate how you bounced back from the tragedy, and I'm sure you could make it flow better.

"scurried through the green summer grass" -> Just that, or was it something else? Maybe running through sprinklers? Maybe something more interesting? :-)

"soaking up the fleeting bliss of childhood" -> beautiful imagery


but -> yet?