HiImShante
Aug 18, 2009
Scholarship / Scholarship Essay: Passion for Computer Science [4]
Okay, I see what you mean as far as the upgrading of computers is concerned. So would I rephrase it as this? Computers have gone from taking up an entire room to in the palms of our hands, which hosts a variety of different functions such as checking our email and even the weather.
Eliminating some exclamation points.
It was the year of 1996... What should I say instead? It was the year of Microsoft's Windows 95?
And lol, i didn't exactly mean devoted. I thought i would look good. Instead of devoted how about working with my childhood desires? hmm, I think I'm going to need a litle bit more help with that.
But I will make sure I put a little bit more about what I do in there.
Thanks for your help so far! Hope your chocolate dreams were sweet ^ ^
Oh yeah, to anyone else reading, it would be great to help me with my grammatical errors.
Okay, I see what you mean as far as the upgrading of computers is concerned. So would I rephrase it as this? Computers have gone from taking up an entire room to in the palms of our hands, which hosts a variety of different functions such as checking our email and even the weather.
Eliminating some exclamation points.
It was the year of 1996... What should I say instead? It was the year of Microsoft's Windows 95?
And lol, i didn't exactly mean devoted. I thought i would look good. Instead of devoted how about working with my childhood desires? hmm, I think I'm going to need a litle bit more help with that.
But I will make sure I put a little bit more about what I do in there.
Thanks for your help so far! Hope your chocolate dreams were sweet ^ ^
Oh yeah, to anyone else reading, it would be great to help me with my grammatical errors.