Scholarship / Chinese language, research, publications... Study plan for China`s Governmental Scholarship [4]

@Holt
Dear Holt, thank you for your useful advice! This is the second time when you really help me to have a chance of winning scholarship! I love you <3

This is my draft , and according to your advice i really tried to cut all unnecessary things but the essay is still looking unsatisfied. please can u read this one time and tell me which parts should i cut and which develop?P.S. i think of wiritng about promoting China in KZ as the last sentence.

Stay hungry. Stay foolish. That is a secret of success and triumphs. In our highly competitive century it is necessary to be educated, strong motivated and hardworking. Recognizing this truth by 15, I am still trying to create a better future for myself.

My name is Dina, I am 21 years old . I am a Bachelor`s student at Eurasian National University after L.N.Gumiylev.Because my interests lays in area of political science, management , international relations, urban studies, I choosed a major that correlates the knowledge of all these areas. My major is ` State and local administration`. During my studies , i tried hard to get the possibly highest marks. Moreovere, I volunteered and worked at different governmental forums and conferences I order to develop necessary skills. * names of conferences* In addition, I made researches to obtain some academic tools.Now I can be ranked as top 10 students of my faculty.

Since early childhood, I was told that person can be described by an education he got. So, I do not want to finish my study with one degree, I want to continue studying Master`s Degree. As Master`s Degree usually concentrates on one specific and exact area I think that enrolling Master`s will play a big role in becoming a competitive professional. Because my major has a deepen focus on economics and administration, choosing country of my future degree was not difficult. I truly believe that China, today`s great power country, can equip me with perfect environment to develop my skills and to get specific knowledge. I am amazed by hardworking skills of Chinese people and their effort they put into creating a country with fast growing economy and technology. And , of course, I am charmed by an old history of this country.

My main priorities of studying in China is to make researches and write publications. I will focus on China`s economical history, and international relations. According to my research, I will concentrate on China`s economical indexes , trade , entrepreneurships and budget. It is a fact that China is a leader in Asia , and my motherland Kazakhstan can learn a lot from it. I want to recognize the differences between China`s and Kazakhstan`s economical policy. * I will add more themes to research*

To make it possible I will make some rules for myself;
-Get the possibly highest marks and communicate with professors in case of improving my weaknesses
-Never limit myself with literature I will be given during lessons, but to read other foreign books and papers
-Always be concentrated
-Find an internship. Internship is the greatest way of putting theory into practice and improve yourself, develop skills and prepare yourself as a young specialist.

-Join university clubs in order to refresh my mind and generate new ideas.
I have no doubt that university will meet all my educational criteria and will help me to do as much research as possible in 2 years.

After finishing master`s Degree in China I am planning to immediately starting working . I will be happy to work in any governmental or international organization, which deals with politics and economy. Because I will be enjoying my work and try to work better . I want to make a meaningful contribution to developing not only my country , but also the whole world. I understand that to do this I need a long experience, that I will fall sometimes, fail. But another thing that I know is that I will never give up. I will use my knowledge and never stop learning something new. I will be happy to make China`s and Kazakhstan`s relations more friendly.

Scholarship / Epog program; I understand the need of education in reaching my ultimate goals [8]

@Holt
thank you so ssssoooooooooooooooo much!!!!!! :=)

Scholarship / Epog program; I understand the need of education in reaching my ultimate goals [8]

@Holt

Being a citizen of a developing country made me aware ...

My undergraduate degree taught at the Eurasian National University after L.N.Gumiylev in Astana , helped me to understand the co-relation between the international processes and global most affected problems. But ,I believe that to achieve in-depth knowledge I must combine my theoretical knowledge with practice. I was participating at more than 50 governmental events and forums during my studies in case to gain some skills in private and public sector ,and to work in economical areas. The most important are Astana Economical Forum , Asian Development Bank Forum ,`Bolashak` forum. During my undergraduate degree I was responsible for a project called `Political Issues in developing countries` . Doing this project gave me a chance to have a discussion with Russian Minister of Foreign Affairs Sergei Dmitrievich Lavrov during his work trip to Astana, Kazakhstan. The success of this project was noticed by a government , so I was the only one undergraduate student to participate in `the UN press-conference for the media about problems in Middle East` which held in Astana, Kazakhstan. Also, I volunteered a lot in a local and non-governmental organizations.

My studies and experience made me be passioned about developing studies and economics. So , now I am applying for EPOG program. As my passion and interest lays in development studies , I truly believe that choosing Option C, will be the best decision. Option C bring a chance to focus on specific areas, which I am really interested in. Also, EPOG program provides students with a chance to study one semester at Witts University in Africa. Studying in a place, that faces a big challenges in terms of poverty and inequalities is the greatest environment to inspire and deepen knowledge. Nonetheless, studying with people, sharing one idea, is a brilliant way to generate new ones.

As a rich country, which has a lot of resources ...

what about this??

Scholarship / Epog program; I understand the need of education in reaching my ultimate goals [8]

@Holt
thanks for your comment! it was really helpful! what do you thin about this version? whill be waiting for your answer
Being a citizen of a developing country made me aware of inequalities and development challenges around me from a young age. As any developing country , Kazakhstan has a big complex of a social-economical problems that directly reflect to people`s lives. A highest rate of corruption, low service of medicine and insurance , unsatisfied level of education , terrorism -this is an ugly portrait of almost more than 50 countries of the world , including my motherland .Instead of living under one blue sky,people from different parts of the world faces different challenges. Living in such conditions inspired me to seek ways of creating a better future for my kids . As a result , I found it very important and interesting to study and analyze factors, which directly need to be improved in countries to reach goals in economics and the social sphere. This led me to choose `State and Local Administration` as a major of my undergraduate degree in order to obtain necessary academic tools.

My undergraduate degree taught at the Eurasian National University ...

Education is a key to success in 21st century` and I understand the need of education in reaching my ultimate goals. That is why I am applying to EPOG program.

As my passion and interest lays in development studies , I truly believe that choosing Option C, will be the best decision. Option C bring a chance to focus on specific areas, which I am really interested in. Also, EPOG program provides students with a chance to study one semester at Witts University in Africa. Studying in a place, that faces a big challenges in terms of poverty and inequalities is the greatest environment to inspire and deepen knowledge. Nonetheless, studying with people, sharing one idea, is a brilliant way to generate new ones.

As a rich country, which has a lot of resources and minerals , it is strange that Kazakhstan`s economy today is going through difficult times . Falling prices of oil totally hit our economy, which now still can not recovery .Consequently, the quality of life are getting worse. Devaluation and inflation left citizens into trouble. The main problem is dependence on oil export. Unfortunately, in 25 years of independence no one could make a way of solving this problem. I strongly know that country needs a new generation of high quality specialists with fresh ideas in case of making a new policy and recovery economy. I have no doubt that EPOG program will meet the criteria of intellectual rigor that I have set for myself and my education in case of doing success in my future , and will equip me with necessary environment to fulfill my potential and sharpen skills to make a meaningful contribution to the development of my country.