HSY
Jan 12, 2017
Undergraduate / Uni Admission Essay - I am more than just my grades [3]
Hi!!!! This is my personal statement to apply for university. I feel that my essay is boring and it doesn't capture much attention. I need help :( Thank you so much!!!
Describe the highlights of your most outstanding achievements or contributions (Maximum: 300 words). (300 WORDS MAX.)
I kept failing during the first two years in secondary school. I told myself, this cannot be my life. I had to start now, or it's never going to happen. I worked hard in my third year onwards and it was acknowledged. I've received EAGLES award (2013), Academic Achievement and Excellence Awards (2012). For my CCA, I had the opportunity to lead the dance team as a vice-captain during my last year. We clinched Gold and Distinction for SYF in 2011 and 2013 respectively. I choreographed a piece for the dance team and was fortunate enough to have it selected and subsequently performed for Teachers Day. I take pride in this achievement as it required a huge deal of confidence and patience on my part as holding that much responsibility and having the whole team counting on me was a first for me.
Polytechnic years were a bit different. I felt lost. I craved for a change, so I joined Dragonboat (DB) in Temasek. DB is a sport that encompasses the elements of power, speed, synchronization and endurance. My first year was a struggle. I have never taken up any sports. I dreaded every training because I was just not strong enough, not fast enough. But I was not giving up. Every training I pushed myself to my maximum and with each training, my weaknesses were diminishing. I woke up every morning knowing that it's mind over matter. The second year, I rose through the ranks and was appointed as a secretary. Together with my teammates, we clinched third for POL-ITES (2015) under Women's Category and second for Mixed Category.
Hi!!!! This is my personal statement to apply for university. I feel that my essay is boring and it doesn't capture much attention. I need help :( Thank you so much!!!
Describe the highlights of your most outstanding achievements or contributions (Maximum: 300 words). (300 WORDS MAX.)
ups and downs in secondary school and then in Polytechnic
I kept failing during the first two years in secondary school. I told myself, this cannot be my life. I had to start now, or it's never going to happen. I worked hard in my third year onwards and it was acknowledged. I've received EAGLES award (2013), Academic Achievement and Excellence Awards (2012). For my CCA, I had the opportunity to lead the dance team as a vice-captain during my last year. We clinched Gold and Distinction for SYF in 2011 and 2013 respectively. I choreographed a piece for the dance team and was fortunate enough to have it selected and subsequently performed for Teachers Day. I take pride in this achievement as it required a huge deal of confidence and patience on my part as holding that much responsibility and having the whole team counting on me was a first for me.
Polytechnic years were a bit different. I felt lost. I craved for a change, so I joined Dragonboat (DB) in Temasek. DB is a sport that encompasses the elements of power, speed, synchronization and endurance. My first year was a struggle. I have never taken up any sports. I dreaded every training because I was just not strong enough, not fast enough. But I was not giving up. Every training I pushed myself to my maximum and with each training, my weaknesses were diminishing. I woke up every morning knowing that it's mind over matter. The second year, I rose through the ranks and was appointed as a secretary. Together with my teammates, we clinched third for POL-ITES (2015) under Women's Category and second for Mixed Category.
