Posts by mezmerize

mezmerize

Sep 7, 2009

Undergraduate / 'German heritage in Maryland' - a draft for the short answer section - Common App [7]

Alright I reworked it. please let me know what u think:

For the summer of 2009, I had an internship at the Schifferstadt Architectural Museum, a German-style house built in 1750. As an intern, I gave multiple tours a day, managed the souvenir department, and maintained the award-winning garden, all while upholding the museums unique, cultural integrity. The museum tours that I gave were my main priority, and I took pride in them because they educated the public about German history, which isn't very prominent in the area. Seeing the eager minds enter, and request a tour, excited me because I knew I would be making other people happy while doing a task I deeply enjoyed. Then they would leave, smiling and thanking me for my services, filling me with a certain type of joy and happiness that could not be achieved by any other means. I compiled over 100 hours this past summer at Schifferstadt, and I cannot wait to go back whenever I get the chance.

mezmerize

Sep 5, 2009

Undergraduate / 'German heritage in Maryland' - a draft for the short answer section - Common App [7]

thank you for your response Llamapoop123.

i agree with what u said about the second sentence, i just wanted to see what other people thought. im thinking about combing it with the first sentence:

For the summer of 2009, I had an internship at the Schifferstadt Architectural Museum, a German-style house built in 1750.

mezmerize

Sep 5, 2009

Undergraduate / 'German heritage in Maryland' - a draft for the short answer section - Common App [7]

I just wrote a draft for the short answer section of the common app and I had a few questions about it? does it need to start off like story with a sort of philosophical meaning or is supposed to be a straight up explanation? here is my current draft, which is a straight up description:

In the space provided below, please elaborate on one of your activities (extracurricular, personal activities, or work experience) (150 words or fewer).

For the summer of 2009, I had an internship at the Schifferstadt Architectural Museum in Frederick, Maryland. Circa 1750, it is the oldest standing building in Frederick County, and one of the oldest of German heritage in Maryland. As an intern, I gave multiple tours a day, managed the souvenir department, and upheld the museums unique, cultural integrity. The museum tours that I gave were my main priority, and I took pride in them because they educated the public about German history, which isn't very prominent in the area. Another one of my duties was to sustain the Schifferstadt Garden, which has won numerous awards for its beauty, as well as for its plentiful amount of herbs and vegetables that are sold to the public. Schifferstadt is a non-profit organization entirely run by volunteers, so the items sold keep the house running. I compiled over 100 hours this past summer at Schifferstadt, and I cannot wait to go back whenever I get the chance.