Graduate / I always cherish the academic excellence moments in my school. Masters in Data Science application [3]

HI All, MY UG was in Electronics and I want to Pursue in Data Science, so there is change of domain for my Masters. I have drafted SOP of My School journey till UG. I will add introduction, purpose , and information about my current work to this body. I feel my draft has more words, Can you plz suggest or help me refine it. Thanks a lot.

I have pasted my draft below. TIA

SOP - Masters in Data Science. Body of SOP

I always cherish the academic excellence moments in my school. I was among top 10 rank holders of the School in my 10th Standard Board Exam scoring 84%. I was Captain of the School leading all the cultural, co-curricular and discipline activities of the school. I participated in numerous debate competitions, quiz competitions and Mathematics competitions in school. To my credit I got 66 certificates till I completed my Schooling up to 10th Standard.

After scoring 94.5% with 99/100 in Maths in 11th Grade and 89% with 99/100 in Statistics, 97/100 in Maths in 12th grade and securing rank 5053 among more than 200,000 students who appeared for Engineering Entrance Exam KCET-2012 I joined Electronics and Communication Engineering in the prestigious X X X X, one of the reputed colleges of India.

The subjects I opted for, during my undergraduate studies involved C, Matlab, Data Structures, HDL,OS, Information Theory and Coding and Computer Networks. The other audit subjects and workshops I enjoyed were Programming languages, Database management system, Android and website application workshops which all helped lay a strong foundation for my understanding of the world of computers and technology My undergraduate study was a richly rewarding experience. The projects done during my undergraduate studies helped to deepen my understanding of the theories learnt in the courses

I always dreamt of making innovative projects. So I decided to design "Wheel alignment indicator" as mini project which monitored the wheel alignment of car regularly and displayed the status of wheels on dashboard itself . This helps the driver to find out about the issue on time and thus avoids damage to the tires. This project was first of its kind and was lauded by Head Of Department.

To enhance my skills , I did Internship during semester break in a startup where I developed Android Application called Boredpad which is similar to notepad in PC and also maintained a database of a client 'X X X X' which also provided me with a business dimension of looking at things. I also learnt website designing using HTML , CSS and PHP as part of intership and also I was part of a group which designed a Website and Android application for The National level Technical fest of my college

Further to expertise on android application I took up Voice/Gesture/Web recognition for Smart Home Application as my major project.
As a part of Data Structure course, I designed Bus Ticket Booking System applying concets of ques and linked lists.

I worked closely with Centre for Technology Innovation and Entrepreneurship (CTIE) and
I was also selected to perform The Industry Project at "X X X" by Government of India on Networking .
I graduated with a CGPA of 8.52/10.Also, it would be worth mentioning that I created a record in college as well as department by scoring a perfect 10/10 in my major and minor projects. I have to my credit, being the first out of 1000 students to be placed in a Company and also having multiple offers from company.

Being part of Robotics committee for 4 years I had organised various workshops on Designing robots and also have numerous prizes under my belt in Robotics competition held in other reputed colleges of India. I had organised Robotics event n National Level Technical fest which fetched maximum number of participants all over the country also it would be worth mentioning that the event was super hit because of the arena and I was applauded by management for such wonderful arena.