AviPatel1
Aug 31, 2019
Undergraduate / Urbana-Champaign Essay review/edits Computer Science - Artificial Intelligence and Bioinformatics [2]
Prompt:
Explain your interest in the major you selected and describe how you have recently explored or developed this interest inside and/or outside the classroom. You may also explain how this major relates to your future career goals. If you're applying to the Division of General Studies, explain your academic interests and strengths or your future career goals. You may include any majors or areas of study you're currently considering. Limit your response to 300 to 400 words.
Major: Computer Science and Statistics
Essay:
It was a Thursday night back in the 3rd grade. I just finished preparing for bed. When I got in bed, I closed my eyes with the intentions of going to sleep. Within minutes, a whole artificial world came to life. Before I knew it, my house transformed into a house 20 years from the future. Robots brought me water and brushed my teeth. My whole family could sleep on the drive to Los Angeles in our self driving car. My brain had internet connectivity. This was like heaven for me until I woke up the next morning to another monotonous day of school.
These dreams were routine for me throughout childhood until 6th grade when I learnt about the field of Computer Science. The thought that I could turn my childhood dreams into reality drew me to pursue programming.
Seen by many as a daunting task, programming for me is effortless. I first began programming in the 7th grade when I was introduced to Javascript. As the years passed, basic Javascript paved the path for full stack web development and Python programming. Today I am proud to say that I am literate in 7 programming languages. A large portion of my free time, when not socializing with friends, is spent broadening my knowledge base in computer programming and reading up about various developments in computer science. I am also an avid attendee at Hackathons.
In my High School years, I have had the honor of being recruited by my school's Engineering and Computer Science department to serve as a mentor and a peer tutor to many students taking their first computer science course. Students would reach out to me with problems both basic and complex. I would find the most simple way to explain the solution to them. My passion for programming not only has the power to make my childhood dreams a reality but it has given me rewarding experiences spreading my love for programming.
At UIUC, I plan on majoring in Computer Science and Statistics with a focus on a combination of both Artificial Intelligence and Bioinformatics. With this combination, I one day hope to start my own company focused on developing an AI-powered wearable health diagnosis device that is both accessible to the masses and smartphone integrated.
Can you guys please provide me with good feedback and suggest edits?
plan on majoring in Computer Science and Statistics at UIUC
Prompt:
Explain your interest in the major you selected and describe how you have recently explored or developed this interest inside and/or outside the classroom. You may also explain how this major relates to your future career goals. If you're applying to the Division of General Studies, explain your academic interests and strengths or your future career goals. You may include any majors or areas of study you're currently considering. Limit your response to 300 to 400 words.
Major: Computer Science and Statistics
Essay:
It was a Thursday night back in the 3rd grade. I just finished preparing for bed. When I got in bed, I closed my eyes with the intentions of going to sleep. Within minutes, a whole artificial world came to life. Before I knew it, my house transformed into a house 20 years from the future. Robots brought me water and brushed my teeth. My whole family could sleep on the drive to Los Angeles in our self driving car. My brain had internet connectivity. This was like heaven for me until I woke up the next morning to another monotonous day of school.
These dreams were routine for me throughout childhood until 6th grade when I learnt about the field of Computer Science. The thought that I could turn my childhood dreams into reality drew me to pursue programming.
Seen by many as a daunting task, programming for me is effortless. I first began programming in the 7th grade when I was introduced to Javascript. As the years passed, basic Javascript paved the path for full stack web development and Python programming. Today I am proud to say that I am literate in 7 programming languages. A large portion of my free time, when not socializing with friends, is spent broadening my knowledge base in computer programming and reading up about various developments in computer science. I am also an avid attendee at Hackathons.
In my High School years, I have had the honor of being recruited by my school's Engineering and Computer Science department to serve as a mentor and a peer tutor to many students taking their first computer science course. Students would reach out to me with problems both basic and complex. I would find the most simple way to explain the solution to them. My passion for programming not only has the power to make my childhood dreams a reality but it has given me rewarding experiences spreading my love for programming.
At UIUC, I plan on majoring in Computer Science and Statistics with a focus on a combination of both Artificial Intelligence and Bioinformatics. With this combination, I one day hope to start my own company focused on developing an AI-powered wearable health diagnosis device that is both accessible to the masses and smartphone integrated.
Can you guys please provide me with good feedback and suggest edits?