Lallity
Oct 23, 2019
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2 - The closure of small local shops [2]
Topic: In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a negative or positive development?
In modern times, there has been a major shift in where to do the shopping, from local and medium-sized stores to mega malls and fancy shopping centers. In my opinion, this trend poses a host of issues as it can take away the ease of shopping near your house and even the jobs of many.
People may have less access to nearby stores as they slowly disappear, causing them a lot of inconveniences. Commuting to shopping malls is mostly time-consuming as they are located in the suburb of the city. In contrast, small shops, which do not take up much space, are opened at every corner of a residential area, providing a sufficient range of products for various demands, instant or daily. Moreover, this might worsen big cities' dilemmas of air pollution and congestion as it requires more traveling by vehicles.
Furthermore, housewives and retired seniors who benefit from selling groceries can find themselves short of the opportunity to earn more income. In developing countries, it is a common scene for the unemployed to establish a business out of selling daily groceries at their house. This helps to support their family financially and also cut down on a significant number of unemployment benefits from the governmental budget. Consequently, losing this flow of money makes them become the dependents in a household, shifting the burden onto other family members and society as a whole.
In conclusion, however many choices a mall can offer at once, I think it is not worth the closure of many local shops, as they are better at satisfying instant needs and generating more job opportunities
Please give comment on my essay. I try to write within exam time duration so it's might not be good in terms of idea.
the coexistence of big malls and the small shops
Topic: In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a negative or positive development?
In modern times, there has been a major shift in where to do the shopping, from local and medium-sized stores to mega malls and fancy shopping centers. In my opinion, this trend poses a host of issues as it can take away the ease of shopping near your house and even the jobs of many.
People may have less access to nearby stores as they slowly disappear, causing them a lot of inconveniences. Commuting to shopping malls is mostly time-consuming as they are located in the suburb of the city. In contrast, small shops, which do not take up much space, are opened at every corner of a residential area, providing a sufficient range of products for various demands, instant or daily. Moreover, this might worsen big cities' dilemmas of air pollution and congestion as it requires more traveling by vehicles.
Furthermore, housewives and retired seniors who benefit from selling groceries can find themselves short of the opportunity to earn more income. In developing countries, it is a common scene for the unemployed to establish a business out of selling daily groceries at their house. This helps to support their family financially and also cut down on a significant number of unemployment benefits from the governmental budget. Consequently, losing this flow of money makes them become the dependents in a household, shifting the burden onto other family members and society as a whole.
In conclusion, however many choices a mall can offer at once, I think it is not worth the closure of many local shops, as they are better at satisfying instant needs and generating more job opportunities
Please give comment on my essay. I try to write within exam time duration so it's might not be good in terms of idea.
