lhd2104
Apr 30, 2020
Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 2-Essay about whether physical education should be compulsory in school. [2]
Hello everyone!
I've never seen this topic before so it was difficult for me to write the essay due to lack of knowledge. Moreover, I usually make mistakes in grammar, so if there is anything wrong, please help me correct it. Thanks a lot for your help!
Some people believe that the best way to improve the general well-being of schoolchildren is to make physical education compulsory in all school. Others, however, think that this would have a little effect on overall health and that other measures are needed.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is widely acknowledged that sports play a pivotal role in our lives. However, the impact of physical education on student health remains a polarizing topic. While a school of thought holds that making PE an obligatory subject is the optimal method in order to improve the general health of schoolchildren, others claim that this has just a small impact. Both views are justifiable, nevertheless, I am predisposed to agree with the latter view.
It is understandable why some people advocate physical education to be mandatory at school. The key rationale in favor of this view is that sports have a tremendous benefit on students, not only on their health but also on their lifestyle. Moreover, this subject can also earn schoolchildren who excel in it praises, privileges and opportunities to engage in further sports competitions. However, this policy may have an adverse effect on the majority of students. The fact that schoolchildren nowadays have to study a host of subjects leads to a state of fatigue, especially in adolescents. Not only do they have to maintain good grades in the compulsory subjects, but also those which they are not fascinated in, namely PE, etc. As a result, they may lose incentive to study.
Instead of the aforementioned approach, I hold a belief that physical education is not necessary for school since there are a lot more elements that determine whether an individual is healthy or not. Nowadays, young people tend to digest junk food which includes cholesterol, fat lipid, and harmful substances. Therefore, the school should offer some culinary nutrition courses and encourage students to get rid of the toxic food due to the long-term effects. If students do sports often at school but not having a balanced diet, then everything will be in vain. My school perfectly exemplifies this principle. It provides sports courses for students who are into this field and always rewards them after each course. Furthermore, nutrition courses are organized to change students' eating habits positively. Consequently, not only does this form relieve schoolchildren from exam worries, but it also guides them to a healthier lifestyle.
In conclusion, while there are rationales to advocate the idea of making physical education obligatory, I am of the opinion that there are other ways to stay healthy rather than do exercises.
Hello everyone!
I've never seen this topic before so it was difficult for me to write the essay due to lack of knowledge. Moreover, I usually make mistakes in grammar, so if there is anything wrong, please help me correct it. Thanks a lot for your help!
Sports at school
Some people believe that the best way to improve the general well-being of schoolchildren is to make physical education compulsory in all school. Others, however, think that this would have a little effect on overall health and that other measures are needed.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is widely acknowledged that sports play a pivotal role in our lives. However, the impact of physical education on student health remains a polarizing topic. While a school of thought holds that making PE an obligatory subject is the optimal method in order to improve the general health of schoolchildren, others claim that this has just a small impact. Both views are justifiable, nevertheless, I am predisposed to agree with the latter view.
It is understandable why some people advocate physical education to be mandatory at school. The key rationale in favor of this view is that sports have a tremendous benefit on students, not only on their health but also on their lifestyle. Moreover, this subject can also earn schoolchildren who excel in it praises, privileges and opportunities to engage in further sports competitions. However, this policy may have an adverse effect on the majority of students. The fact that schoolchildren nowadays have to study a host of subjects leads to a state of fatigue, especially in adolescents. Not only do they have to maintain good grades in the compulsory subjects, but also those which they are not fascinated in, namely PE, etc. As a result, they may lose incentive to study.
Instead of the aforementioned approach, I hold a belief that physical education is not necessary for school since there are a lot more elements that determine whether an individual is healthy or not. Nowadays, young people tend to digest junk food which includes cholesterol, fat lipid, and harmful substances. Therefore, the school should offer some culinary nutrition courses and encourage students to get rid of the toxic food due to the long-term effects. If students do sports often at school but not having a balanced diet, then everything will be in vain. My school perfectly exemplifies this principle. It provides sports courses for students who are into this field and always rewards them after each course. Furthermore, nutrition courses are organized to change students' eating habits positively. Consequently, not only does this form relieve schoolchildren from exam worries, but it also guides them to a healthier lifestyle.
In conclusion, while there are rationales to advocate the idea of making physical education obligatory, I am of the opinion that there are other ways to stay healthy rather than do exercises.
