Posts by phungtrong

phungtrong

Dec 28, 2020

Writing Feedback / Spending money promoting a healthy lifestyle, or on the treatment of people who are already ill? [4]

thank you for your correction much
i am a 6-year student in medical university. I just take a first ilets course and this first essay is mine. so hope that when i post new ones which will be got your correction

phungtrong

Dec 27, 2020

Writing Feedback / It is commonly said that youngsters obesity is becoming a dire problem for numerous world's nations [2]

... discuss the common specific causes and consequences. of this condition as well as how to scientifically address it without any side effect.
sugar-containing treats and junk food>> processed food, because "cheeseburgers, hot dogs, and pizzas" is primary calory, not sugar
This lack of exercise can ...>> a sedentary lifestyle can significantly contribute.... (lối sống tĩnh tại)

The children with obesity are able at a higher and earlier risk of getting not only cardiovascular diseases but also cancer or diabetes compare to the same others

minor illnesses>> these youngsters can be susceptible to disease triggers since they are overweight and unfit because of relating to reduce immune system
due to........ you should review this

phungtrong

Dec 27, 2020

Writing Feedback / Spending money promoting a healthy lifestyle, or on the treatment of people who are already ill? [4]

This is a first time i write ilets task 2. Please help me improve my writing skill. Thanks a lot!

Discussion on:
It is more important to spend public money promoting a healthy lifestyle in order to prevent illness than to spend it on the treatment of people who are already ill.

To what extent do you agree of disagree?

Some people suggest that it would be good for patients to spend the budget on treatment more than spend it on preventing from diseases. In my opinion, spreading a healthy style play a important role to improve and protect both mental and physical health.

On the one hand, there are some reasons that it is important for people to be treat by the budget when they get sick more than take advantage of it into prevention. The first reason, many income-low countries, most individuals spend their entire time on earning money to survive so that they have not found the importance of prevention. Another reason, a heathy style such as physical activities, balance diets or confortable mental heath help us prevent from both communicable and non-communicable diseases. But, They do not offer results clearly and people do not see it directly. On contrast, If a surgery is succeed, it will be recognized immediately.

On the other hand, in my opinion. The medicine industry is divided 2 branches: treatment and prevention. It is so essential for people that nothing is possible to replace. However, If a country concentrate on more the prevention, it will develop significantly. Because of according some existing reputable surveys show that expenditures providing the treatment are ten times the prevention. In addition, the prevention from diseases is at heath-related risk safer than the treatment. Due not to suffer from a surgery which is always better than it happen even if successful

In conclusion. Although, many people still want to use the budget for treatment. but, I personally support that spending public money on advertising healthy activities is always better spend it on curing.