Writing Feedback / Arguementative/Persuasive essay on camping [2]

Feedback on structure and GRAMMAR is greatly appreciated!!!!

Everyone Should Go Camping

Camping can take on many definitions. Camping to one person can mean seclusion in the middle of a forest. Another individual might think camping as a motor home with all the amenities of their house, including the kitchen sink. Whatever the definition is, camping is an experience that should be tried by everyone.

The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency has posted on their website, epa.gov/iaq/pubs/insidest.html, that approximately 90% of a person's life is spent indoors. The same article goes on to state "In the last several years, a growing body of scientific evidence has indicated that the air within homes and other buildings can be more seriously polluted than the outdoor air in even the largest and most industrialized cities." Spending time camping is a great way to revitalize the lungs. The phrase "city air" often is thought as air that is polluted, while "country air" is often used to describe clean, healthy air. Breathing the country air usually makes a person feel revitalized. There is no better way to receive the country air than while camping.

Another great part about camping is being outside under the sun. The sun rays help the human body with the production of vitamin D. In fact, other than popping a vitamin pill, the only way that a body can produce vitamin D is through the exposure to the sun. Feeling the warm rays of the sun hit the face is always a welcome sensation. Being outside in the sun is another great advantage of camping.

With the recent downturn of the economy, people are always trying to find ways to have fun at a relative inexpensive cost. Camping is a great way to have fun while keeping the overall cost down. A one night stay at Sands of Time RV Park costs twenty two dollars a night. That fee includes water, sewer, and electric. A stay in a condo in the same area will cost at least $645.00 for the week. A condo will cost the family $491 more than a campsite. That difference in price can make a camping trip a good possibility while keeping the overall costs down to a minimum.

Camping gives anyone the possibility to go places that they have never been before. Camping can take you to Yosemite, or into the Band Lands of South Dakota. Camping can also take place at a nearby state park. No matter where the campsite is, a camper can feel miles away from the city. There are so many places both near and far that are best experienced by spending a few days within the place. Camping gives you the ability to see these beautiful locations at first sunlight, in the middle of the day, at sunset and even under the stars. It can be amazing how different the same object can look throughout the day.

Campers often express how a feeling comes over their body when they reach the moment when the day to day turmoil leaves their body. Virtually every camper experiences this moment. This is specifically when they are experiencing nature and the realization is made how much simpler life is when outside with nature. Returning to nature often allows campers to return to their true selves. It is this discovery that should be experienced by all.

The benefits of camping can also be seen in families. Some people that do not like the idea of camping give the reason of having to camp with people in such a confined space. It this confined space that, when allowed, can create a close bond between family members. When families go camping, they put the jobs and sporting events on hold. There are usually no video games being played, no soccer practice to drive to, and no business projects to worry about. By putting aside all of these events, the family has an opportunity to bond and renew their relationships. Some of this may be foreign to some people and there can be resistance. When this resistance is put aside, these bonds will be renewed. Camping is a great way to bring families together and strengthen their love.

Food is always a item that people cannot do without. Campers have an opportunity to try some interesting food. Cooking over a fire makes burgers and potatoes taste better than can be found at any fast food place. Campers need to think out their meals thoroughly prior to making a trip. These well planned meals are sometimes the best meals that campers have ever had. Cooking a chicken over campfire, cooking an apple pie in a dutch oven, and cooking a burger wrapped in foil on the coals of a camp fire can put the best gourmet chefs to shame. Perhaps it is the fresh smoke, the clean air or just the fact that a camper's senses are heightened. Whatever the reasons are, food always tastes better when camping.

Some of the people that can be met while camping can make the entire trip better. Campers can come from every state, and sometimes different countries. Taking a simple walk around the campsite, the camper can encounter these people and hear the most amazing stories. Campers are friendly and enjoy the company of fellow campers. Kids always seem to find new "best friends" for the weekends and even adults may find themselves sharing a meal with their new neighbors.

Sometimes camping can also make campers realize the overlooked luxuries that they experience day to day. Flush toilets, warm showers, central heating and air, and even the lack of bugs accompanying the sleeping camper are some of the luxuries that are missed the most. A small weekend away from these luxuries can make the campers realize how lucky they are in their day to day living.

Camping is one of the most basic and enjoyable activities that can be experienced by all. Camping has no requirements other than willing participants. Camping doesn't discriminate, doesn't have deadlines and has nothing but fun around each corner. No matter if the camping is experienced in a tent or in a luxury camper, getting outside, in the wilderness can provide a lifetime of memories. Camping has something for everyone.

Writing Feedback / Compare and contrast of my children [4]

My teacher gave us an assignment to compare and contrast 2 things. I chose my 2 children as I, obviously know them well. My grammar needs major improvement. I would appreciate any and all feedback on my essay. It follows...

Children Essay

It is amazing how two individuals can grow up in the same household and yet have so many differences. Max and Sydney Welch are almost complete opposites at the superficial level while their beliefs and views on family, or core values, are very similar. Max and Sydney have learned what their parents find important and have adopted that towards themselves. Even while they have done this, they have managed to maintain their individualities.

Their difference at the superficial level is obvious at the most basic level, color and coordination. Max is the typical eight year old boy whose favorite color is blue or sometimes green. Sydney is the typical girl who at age six has the favorite color of pink and purple. Sydney often brings her taste in colors into her daily dress. She naturally picks out colorful outfits that are color coordinated. Max takes his taste in color and also puts it into his choosing of clothes, however often struggles with what clothes match. Max likes to look nice, as does his sister, however he often needs assistance, and does ask for it, when picking out clothes in the morning.

Max loves sports. On a sunny afternoon, Max is usually found outside kicking a ball or running a bike. He typically chooses to play games that involve other people. Soccer, kick ball, and basketball are some of his favorite pastimes. If the weather is not appropriate for outside play, he would be content with being inside watching these same sports on the television. Max doesn't care who is playing, he just wants to watch the game for the sake of the game. Sydney game of choice usually involves her playing by herself. On occasion, she will step beyond her norm and join the games her brother plays, although her time involved will be short. Sydney would be content making up a game in her own mind and acting it out on the side of the house. If Sydney has friends over, she will invite them to play in her acting, infrequently getting them involved in a team type of game. Differences in playing style are not a core value, not something that makes their true selves. This difference makes the two look very different, while not revealing who they are when it comes to their values.

Another superficial difference is in their preference of dessert. While they both enjoy Macaroni and Cheese, as most American children do, their tastes in desserts can differ immensely. Sydney is not prejudice against any type of dessert. If the desert is considered a sweet, then she will partake and devour the entire portion. On the other hand, Max will partake with the desert, but often leaves it half eaten. Max enjoys the taste of cake and ice cream, he just does not like it to the same amount that his sister does. Frequently Max will pass his desert onto his father when he is done with it and then goes off to play.

While Max and Sydney have many differences, it is their similarities of their core values that create a close and loving family. Max and Sydney is each other's best friend. They are perfectly content playing with each other, at least once they agree on the game. Max and Sydney will look out for each other. Once when Max and Sydney were at their cousin's house, someone was picking on Sydney and causing her to cry. Max got up and immediately got in the way and pushed the cousin out of the way and defended his sister. Underneath all of those differences, they do have a great deal of love for each other and the rest of their family.

Max and Sydney have also experienced many camping trips. This exposure to the outdoors made them value what is found outside of the big cities. Some of their fondest memories involve a place they call "Uncle Harry's Cabin." This cabin sits on approximately 250 acres of land that is covered with trees, rocks and a small river. If a choice of what to do involved going to the cabin, the trip to the cabin always won. Max and Sydney enjoy walking along a trail and looking at the trees and grass. They enjoy finding a swimming hole along the river where they can take a plunge. A visit to this place often includes a bonfire which each will enjoy sitting around. Their love for the outdoors is immense.

Max and Sydney are very different when you look at them on their surface. As they get older, their differences in activities will grow further apart, however their love for each other and their family should remain a driving force in their lives. It is very likely that when Max gets married and has children, his children will all be involved in many team sports and sports will always be on TV. Sydney's family will enjoy the arts and crafts and her house will be full of her family's creations. Their families will look completely different, however the values that Max and Sydney have will be evident. It is these similarities that will always keep them together.