Writing Feedback / Writing task 2: Students should be primarily taught academic subjects so that they can pass exams [4]

Students should be primarily taught academic subjects so that they can pass exams, and practical skills such as cooking should not be taught.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is said that the curriculum for student need to concentrate on academic subject than many practical skills like cooking or team-working. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with this statement.

We can clearly see that today, curriculum are not built to become comprehensive education in many countries. The lack of practical classes are consequently made the generation which are subject to shortage of skills which are necessary to tackle with their daily problems. For instance, nowadays, wider range of adolescent have limited experience in cooking and repairing their household appliances. Furthermore, most of the youngsters are socially inept, thereby struggling to communicate and build up relationships with others. When they get adulthood, they tend be ill-equipped to deal with other issues related to jobs, families and other relationships.

Besides that, the absence of encouragement in training practical skills have adverse impacts on the perception of students. In spite of the fact that the experimental skills are more essential than academic knowledge on surviving in daily life and contributing the jubilant family and happiness, students tend to have a misbelief that having academic achievement in school and steady theoretical fomulas will help them achieve dream life. This misguided thinking lead to a numerous failures in their whole aspect of future life.

In conclusion, the curriculum which concentrate on academic and ignore the soft skills will cause the undesirable outcomes for young generation. Students should be raised awareness about this vital skills and effort to improve it.

My essay is marked 5/9 ielts and i wonder how to improve mark in this essay. Honestly thank all people give me feedback.