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Posts by fuckincute [Suspended]
Name: Mai
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Last Post: Mar 31, 2022
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fuckincute   
Mar 31, 2022
Writing Feedback / Data on the bird population essay [3]

You repeated the same structure "In...(year), the number of...."
You can replace "the number of" with "the figure for", use active sentences or "the year ...saw an increase in...", "there was an increase in..." so your score in grammar might be higher
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